Placeholder Content Image

Man served with AVO after turning up on Sophie Monk’s doorstep

<p>A man has been served with an AVO after he turned up at Sophie Monk’s home clutching a single red rose; claiming he was the victim of an elaborate catfishing scam that robbed him of $7,000.</p> <p>Brian Rapley said police questioned him “like I was some crazed stalker” but insisted that he had months of messages on his phone between him and the person he had believed to be Monk.</p> <p>“I feel like such an idiot,” he told the Daily Telegraph. “But I thought we were in a relationship."</p> <p>Police were called on April 25 to Monk’s NSW Central Coast home after a man was spotted outside at 7:30am calling her name. He returned later that evening and was swarmed by police.</p> <p>Rapley, 49, said five police cars descended on him.</p> <p>"They said to me, ‘What are you here to do to Sophie Monk?’ and I said, ‘I’m here to meet her for the first time, we are in a relationship'."</p> <p>Monk wasn’t home at the time as she was with her husband Joshua Gross in Queensland filming a movie Zombie Plane with US entertainer Vanilla Ice.</p> <p>“I do not know any person by the name of Brian Rapley. I am not in a relationship with anyone by the name of Brian Rapley. I am currently happily married to my husband Joshua Gross,” Monk said in a statement to police.</p> <p>Rapley wasn’t officially charged but was served with an AVO and told not to approach the TV personality.<br />He had told police that he genuinely believed it was Monk he was communicating with after he left a message on her verified Instagram account.</p> <p>“Then next thing I get a message from another account but with the same profile pic as Sophie, saying, ‘Hey, it's Sophie … let’s chat here, my manager reads my official account, so this is better,’” he told the Daily Telegraph.</p> <p>Over the span of four months, he said he and the person he believed to be Monk spoke regularly.</p> <p>Rapley showed the outlet the multiple messages he claimed he thought were from the star.</p> <p>One of the messages to him read, “I love you”.</p> <p>However, there were telling signs that it was likely a scam as the “relationship” never moved from messaging to phone calls.</p> <p>“I did think that was weird. I was like ‘If you are who you say you are, you could walk into a shop and get a new phone for free’”.</p> <p>However, the account explained that their phone was broken and they were too busy to buy a new one.</p> <p>Rapley then said he fell for a scam in which the person he thought was Monk said she was “getting all this money” but asked him to send her cash in the meantime.</p> <p>When he questioned why he would be sending money to such a high-profile celeb, he was told it was just “bank account drama”.</p> <p>He then revealed that the person he was messaging provided him with Monk’s address and told him to meet her there on April 25 so they could finally meet face-to-face.</p> <p>Rapley said he was embarrassed.</p> <p>“Look, I know it sounds stupid … I look like a right fool but the truth is I’m just lonely, and I believed her.”</p> <p><em>Image credit: Getty</em></p>

Relationships

Placeholder Content Image

Home and Away catfisher has jail sentence increased

<p dir="ltr">A woman who posed as <em>Home and Away</em> actor Lincoln Lewis to catfish online victims and stalk multiple women has had her prison sentence increased after losing her appeal.</p> <p dir="ltr">Lydia Abdelmalek, 32, was sentenced to four years imprisonment at the County Court of Victoria earlier this week, an increase of one year and four months on the original sentence handed down around three years ago.</p> <p dir="ltr">Judge Claire Quin said she regarded Lydia’s offences as a “very serious example of stalking” and material she had received from the victims demonstrated the “cruel, brutal and ongoing impact” it had on them and their families.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Despite the content of some of the material being reflective of a fictional soap opera, it was not fantasy. It was real and impacted real people,” Judge Quin said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“What may begin as lighthearted can quickly escalate and have significant consequences for the psychological wellbeing of those to whom the ruse is directed.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“It was persistent and malicious.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Judge Quin also noted that Abdelmalek showed no remorse for her crimes, even after one of her victims took her own life. </p> <p dir="ltr">Abdelmalek used various online personas over several years, including former <em>Home and Away</em> actor Lincoln Lewis and British soap star Danny Mac, to catfish and stalk people online from 2011.</p> <p dir="ltr">Judge Quin suggested Abdelmalek’s offending may have been driven by a “number of complex personality factors”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Her behaviour has been driven by a wish to seek relational intimacy and wish fulfilment on a background of perceived inadequacy,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">She was sentenced to two years and eight months in prison in the Heidelberg Magistrates Court back in June 2019.</p> <p dir="ltr">She was later released on bail after she appealed the conviction but failed to overturn the six counts of stalking earlier this year.</p> <p> </p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: County Court of Victoria</em></p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

“Bizarre” Home and Away impersonator loses court appeal

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article includes mentions of suicide.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">A female ‘catfish’ who impersonated a <em>Home and Away </em>star to attract women online and was found guilty of stalking has failed in her bid to overturn her conviction.</p> <p dir="ltr">Lydia Abdelmalek was found guilty of six counts of stalking three years ago after she impersonated Lincoln Lewis, the star who played Geoff Campbell in the popular soap.</p> <p dir="ltr">Though she first launched her appeal in 2019, the guilty verdict was upheld in Victoria’s County Court on May 26, as reported by <em><a href="https://www.canberratimes.com.au/story/7754837/home-and-away-catfish-loses-court-appeal/?cs=14231" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Canberra Times</a></em>.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I find the appellant was responsible for the stalking behaviour,” Judge Claire Quin told the court.</p> <p dir="ltr">Judge Quin described the case as “bizarre” and rejected evidence presented by Ms Abdelmalek.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I found her account confusing, deliberate and that she was deliberately evasive,” Judge Quin said. “Her account does not make sense.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The court also heard that a phone seized from Ms Abdelmalak’s home during the appeal in relation to another case contained “incriminating” evidence against her, according to the <em><a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-05-26/lydia-abdelmalek-lincoln-lewis-catfish-appeal/101099416" target="_blank" rel="noopener">ABC</a></em>.</p> <p dir="ltr">The court heard that the phone contained a wealth of material that “supported the accounts provided by the victims”, including hundreds of texts and pictures sent to the women she stalked, intimate photos, and Mr Lewis’ real voicemail.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Much of this material was not available at the time of the Magistrates’ hearing,” Judge Quin said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“The enormity of this behaviour could not be over exaggerated.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Ms Abdelmalek impersonated the TV star and used other aliases to stalk seven people over a four-year period starting from May 2011, in what one victim called “sick mind games”.</p> <p dir="ltr">One of Ms Abdelmalek’s victims who died by suicide wrote a statement prior to her death where she outlined the trauma she experienced from being tricked into believing the actor was in love with her.</p> <p dir="ltr">She said she felt tortured for the “sick fascination, perverse pleasure and unhealthy satisfaction” of her tormentor.</p> <p dir="ltr">Another victim said she went from being the life of the party to a recluse after what the sentencing magistrate described as a “calculated and cruel” offence.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>If you are experiencing a personal crisis or thinking about suicide, you can call Lifeline 131 114 or beyondblue 1300 224 636 or visit <a href="https://www.lifeline.org.au/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">lifeline.org.au</a> or <a href="https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/national-help-lines-and-websites" target="_blank" rel="noopener">beyondblue.org.au</a>.</em></p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-809f9e68-7fff-e3b1-a053-0cfcec6ba428"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Heidelberg Magistrates Court</em></p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

A first date that ended WAY before it even began

<p dir="ltr">One woman thought she found an incredible guy to date - a complete catch. But she soon realised he was far from it.</p> <p dir="ltr">Her dreamy date had been sending her the sweetest messages until he texted something he shouldn’t have. In a video clip the woman shared on TikTok, she shared how well the conversation was going. Showing texts of the man complimenting her when they were trying to set up a time to meet for their date. </p> <p dir="ltr">Although they both admitted they would be coming straight from their jobs and therefore be wearing their work clothes, the man said it wouldn’t be a problem.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’m sure you’ll look beautiful either way.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I’m a lucky guy to take you out,” he gushed.</p> <p dir="ltr">However, the mood of the conversation immediately changed when the man sent a photo of the woman in a bikini to her along with a text that was clearly not meant for her.</p> <p dir="ltr">The text read: “No bro. She’s a solid four and I would for sure keep it on the low.</p> <p dir="ltr">“But desperate times call for desperate measures.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Beggars can’t be choosers.</p> <p dir="ltr">“All I saw was [boobs] and an easy lay.”</p> <p dir="ltr">As soon as he realised who he had sent the message to, he immediately apologised and tried to back track where he went wrong.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I was talking about someone else and clicked your picture on accident. My bad,” he said.</p> <p dir="ltr">Needless to say, the woman was left speechless and her video made it look like that was the end of their conversation. Viewers of the woman’s video rallied behind her and encouraged her to look at the brighter side of things. </p> <p dir="ltr">“A four? A four!? Is he blind?</p> <p dir="ltr">“Girl, you dodged a major bullet. Hang in there!” one person commented.</p> <p dir="ltr">Others went on to suggest he’d actually sent the message to her on purpose.</p> <p dir="ltr">“What bothers me most is that him sending it to you seems secretly intentional.</p> <p dir="ltr">“What kind of monster does that?!” a second person questioned.</p> <p> </p> <p dir="ltr">“Nah that was 100% on purpose,” added a third.</p> <p><em><span style="font-size: 11.5pt; font-family: Arial; color: #000000; background-color: transparent; font-weight: 400; font-variant: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Image: TikTok</span></em></p>

Relationships

Placeholder Content Image

The dangers of catfish in online dating

<p>On the internet, you can become <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/comic-riffs/post/nobody-knows-youre-a-dog-as-iconic-internet-cartoon-turns-20-creator-peter-steiner-knows-the-joke-rings-as-relevant-as-ever/2013/07/31/73372600-f98d-11e2-8e84-c56731a202fb_blog.html">anyone you want to</a> – at least for a while. And though deception doesn’t fit well with lasting romance, people lie all the time: <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2016.06.052">Fewer than a third of people in one survey</a> claimed they were always honest in online interactions, and nearly nobody expected others to be truthful. Much of the time, lies are meant to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/joc/jqy019">make the person telling them seem better</a> somehow – more attractive, more engaging or otherwise worth getting to know.</p> <p>“Catfishing” is a more advanced effort of digital deception. Named in a <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1584016/">2010 movie</a> that later expanded into an <a href="http://www.mtv.com/shows/catfish-the-tv-show">MTV reality series</a>, a catfish is a person who sets up an intentionally fake profile on one or more social network sites, often with the purpose of defrauding or deceiving other users.</p> <p>It happens more than people might think – and to more people than might believe it. Many times in my own personal life when I was seeking to meet people online, I found that someone was being deceptive. In one case, I did a <a href="https://images.google.com/">Google image search</a> and found a man’s profile picture featured on a site called “Romance Scams.” Apparently, not everyone looking for love and connection online wants to start from a place of truth and honesty. Yet, as the show demonstrates to viewers, online lies can often be easy to detect, by searching for images and phone numbers and exploring social media profiles. Some people lie anyway – and plenty of others take the bait.</p> <div class="embed-responsive embed-responsive-16by9" style="text-align: center;"><iframe class="embed-responsive-item" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/pVyClEUiK40"></iframe></div> <p><strong>Why might someone become a catfish?</strong></p> <p>When a deep emotional bond grows with someone, even via texts, phone calls and instant messages, it can be devastating to find out that person has been lying about some major aspect of their identity or intentions. My analysis of the <a href="https://scholarworks.uni.edu/etd/153/">first three seasons of the <em>Catfish</em> TV show</a> reveals that there are several reasons someone might choose to become a deceitful catfish. On the show, ordinary people who suspect they’re being catfished get help from the hosts to untangle the lies and find the truth.</p> <p>Sometimes the deception is unintentional. For instance, some people <a href="http://doi.org/10.1111/j.1083-6101.2006.00020.x">don’t know themselves well</a>, so they tend to see and present themselves more positively than is accurate. In episode 13 from the show’s second season, a <a href="http://www.mtv.com/news/3064701/catfish-chasity-family-cousin-mandy/">woman named Chasity</a> uses someone else’s pictures and claims to be named Kristen. Others may intentionally create a fake profile but then <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3188104/">connect with someone unexpectedly deeply</a> and find the situation hard to come clean about.</p> <p>Other catfish intend to deceive their targets, though not out of malice. For instance, they pretend to be someone else because they have low self-esteem or for some other reason <a href="https://www.bustle.com/articles/29450-miranda-james-are-a-catfish-miracle-these-skyping-pals-give-us-hope-for-future">think people won’t like the real person</a> they are. On the show, there are several episodes about people who are struggling with aspects of their gender identity or sexual orientation and don’t know how to behave appropriately about those internal conflicts, or who fear bullying or violence if they openly identify their true selves.</p> <p>Some catfish, though, set out to hurt people: for instance, to get revenge on a particular person because they are angry, hurt or embarrassed about something that has happened between them. In one episode, for instance, a <a href="http://www.mtv.com/news/2384114/catfish-jasmine-mhissy/">woman catfishes her best friend</a> to get back at her because they’re both interested in the same real-world man.</p> <p>The show also highlighted a few catfish who found enjoyment making fake profiles and <a href="https://www.bustle.com/articles/26966-catfish-tracie-thoms-superfan-sammie-bring-an-episode-thats-both-dark-and-redeeming">getting attention from strangers</a> online. Others wanted to see if they could <a href="https://www.vulture.com/2013/09/catfish-recap-season-2-aaliyah-alicia-iphone.html">make money</a>. Still others hoped to capitalize on the growing popularity of the show itself, wanting to actually meet someone famous or <a href="http://www.mtv.com/news/2158036/catfish-where-now-sneak-peek-dee-pimpin/">become famous</a> by being on TV.</p> <div class="embed-responsive embed-responsive-16by9" style="text-align: center;"><iframe class="embed-responsive-item" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/IoMYDl6vkMk"></iframe></div> <p style="text-align: center;"><span class="caption">Some people think they’re actually dating a celebrity online.</span></p> <p><strong>Why do people fall for a catfish?</strong></p> <p>People want to trust those they interact with online and in real life. If a person believes he or she is <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1461444818792425">on a date with someone being deceptive</a>, things tend not to progress to a second date.</p> <p>In the TV show, victims find out about the lies the catfish have told, exposed by the show’s hosts and co-investigators. Many who learn of being lied to <a href="http://www.mtv.com/video-clips/99acvt/catfish-the-tv-show-confidence-in-jenn">aren’t particularly interested in meeting up</a> with the real person behind the mask they’d been communicating with.</p> <p>Someone who is enthralled in their connection with another person often fully believes what they’re told – even if it seems too good to be true. This is what scholars call the “<a href="http://psychology.about.com/od/socialpsychology/f/halo-effect.htm">halo effect</a>,” which suggests that if a person likes someone initially, they’re more likely to continue to view them as good, even if that person does something bad. Effectively, that positive first impression has created a figurative angelic halo, suggesting the person is less likely to do wrong. In the very first episode of <em>Catfish: The TV Show</em>, Sunny believes that her love interest Jamison is a model holding cue cards on a late-night comedy show and studying to become an anesthesiologist. Sunny has a very hard time accepting that none of those claims are true of Chelsea, the real person claiming to be Jamison.</p> <p>A complementary idea, called “hyperpersonal connection,” suggests that people who <a href="http://doi.org/10.1177/009365096023001001">develop deep emotional ties to each other very quickly</a> may be more trusting, and may even feel safer sharing things facelessly online than they would in person. So someone who met a new friend online and felt an immediate connection might share deeply personal feelings and experiences – expecting the other person to reciprocate. Sometimes the catfish do, but they’re not always telling the truth.</p> <p>Another reason people might not look too deeply into whether the person they’re talking to is real is that they don’t want the relationship to change, even if they say they do – or think they might in the future. If it’s meeting their needs to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2016.06.052">feel accepted, appreciated, connected and less lonely</a>, why rock the boat? That could risk shattering the fantasy of a potential “happily ever after.” Some people also might not really plan ever to meet in real life anyway. So they don’t feel a need to verify the identity behind the online mask, and any lying will never actually matter.</p> <p>Other people might feel guilty, as if they were <a href="https://link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/A297135951/AONE?u=googlescholar&amp;sid=AONE&amp;xid=a49adec8">snooping on someone</a> they should trust, who might be upset if they found out their claims were being verified – even though the liar is the one who should feel bad, not the fact-checker.</p> <p>People can still meet and develop real relationships through dating sites, apps and social media. But catfish are still out there, so it pays to be skeptical, especially if the person is never able to talk on the phone or by video chat. Ask questions about their lives and backgrounds; beware if someone gives fishy answers. Do your own background checking, searching images, phone numbers and social networks like they do on the <em>Catfish</em> show. Someone who’s sincere will be impressed at your savvy – and that you care enough to ensure you’re both being honest.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/109702/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: http://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em>Written by <span>Nicole Marie Allaire, Lecturer in English, Iowa State University</span>. Republished with permission of </em><a rel="noopener" href="https://theconversation.com/have-you-caught-a-catfish-online-dating-can-be-deceptive-109702" target="_blank"><em>The Conversation</em></a><em>.</em></p>

Relationships

Our Partners