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Gratitude amplified: Unlocking the key to happiness and deep connections

<p>In today's fast-paced world, filled with negative news, challenging experiences, and personal losses, finding joy and gratitude can often be a difficult task.</p> <p>As we naturally tend to focus on the negative aspects of life, it becomes essential to pause and cultivate gratitude, which can have a profound impact on our lives and the lives of those around us.</p> <p><strong>What is gratitude? </strong></p> <p>Gratitude involves showing appreciation for the things in life that are important to you, and taking a moment to notice and acknowledge these moments have proven benefits of lifting mood and helping you feel more positive throughout the day. Have you ever stopped to notice that there is something to be grateful for every day if we just take stock? It could be a person who kindly let you merge into traffic, a refreshing breeze on a scorching day, a beautiful rainbow after a heavy downpour, or a thoughtful call or text from a friend. </p> <p>Gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships. We also know that Gratitude begets gratitude, meaning that any kind act is likely to bring kindness back, in spades! </p> <p><strong>Practice Gratitude – Write down 3 things per day</strong></p> <p><a href="https://theresilienceproject.com.au/">The Resilience Project</a> changed my life by introducing a simple practice: at the end of each day, we take five minutes to write down three things we are grateful for that happened that day. It could be as simple as a walk in the sun, a phone call from a friend, a stroll with your dog, or even a comforting cup of tea. </p> <p>Engaging in this exercise helps you articulate your gratitude and realise the abundance of things to be grateful for in our everyday lives.</p> <p>I personally experienced the transformative power of gratitude during the two years of COVID lockdown in Victoria while working full-time and home schooling my two boys, aged 8 and 10. Our family embraced this practice each night, which not only changed our outlook on life but also sparked positive conversations during dinner.</p> <p>Surprisingly, it was often the simplest things we were all grateful for, like homemade meals or cherished moments of togetherness.</p> <p>I distinctly remember preparing a hot meal and passing it over our neighbour's fence when their family was unwell with COVID. To our surprise, a few weeks later, they reciprocated with a homecooked meal. In those challenging times, a sense of community became such a source of positivity, and we were immensely grateful for the love that went into that dinner.</p> <p>So why not take the time to stop and smell the roses and practice gratitude? Who knows, over time, you may start to notice your stress levels decreasing, your relationships improving, and be blessed with a strengthened sense of community.</p> <p><strong><em>Melissa Cutajar is <a href="https://www.connectedwomen.net/">Connected Women</a>’s Member Experience and Partnerships Manager. With a deep interest in health and wellness, Melissa is a source of positivity and creativity to the Connected Women team.</em></strong></p> <p><strong><em><a href="http://connectedwomen.net/">Connected Women</a> provides a community for women over 50 to connect with each other and build meaningful friendships. With a rapidly growing communities in Perth, Sydney, Wollongong, and Melbourne, Connected Women provides a safe and welcoming space for women to come together and share experiences. To learn more about the organisation and how you can get involved, visit connectedwomen.net.</em></strong></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p>

Relationships

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"Clueless": Meghan Markle told to show some gratitude

<p dir="ltr">American journalist Megyn Kelly has once again called out Meghan Markle for always talking about herself. </p> <p dir="ltr">The Duchess of Sussex came out swinging in her latest podcast titled <em>To ‘B’ or not to ‘B’?</em>, in which she hit back at her nickname, “Duchess Difficult”.</p> <p dir="ltr">She said the nickname was a way of gaslighting women and “is really a codeword for the B-word”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Kelly had enough of the Duchess’ incessant nagging and said there was another word to call her. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I wouldn’t necessarily call her the B-word, but I would definitely call her the C-word: clueless,” she said on the GB News <em>Dan Wootton Tonight</em> program.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She’s utterly clueless and I am so sick of her off-point irrelevant musings about her non-problems.”</p> <p dir="ltr">She went on to reveal that the homicide rates of more than 100,000 homeless people in California, where Meghan lives, “reached an all-time high”. </p> <p dir="ltr">“And we are supposed to give a damn if someone is calling [Meghan] the b-word or difficult?” Kelly continued.</p> <p dir="ltr">“We don’t, she doesn’t get it. No one gives a damn about these non-problems.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She should stop complaining and start showing some gratitude for what appears to be a very beautiful life of which she finds nothing to celebrate.</p> <p dir="ltr">“We don’t care. Shut up! Stop talking about yourself and show some humility and gratitude.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Meghan was given the nickname back in 2018 when she was accused of displaying “dictator” style behaviour towards her staff members - which led to one of them quitting.</p> <p dir="ltr">“My friend said to me, there’s a certain point when you come to terms with the fact that not everyone is going to like you,” Meghan continued.</p> <p dir="ltr">“The goal can’t be for everyone to like you, but the goal can be for them to respect you.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Images: Getty/GB Tonight</em></p>

TV

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"Deep gratitude": Meghan Markle pays tribute to Queen Elizabeth

<p>Meghan Markle has paid tribute to the late Queen Elizabeth, saying she feels "deep gratitude" for the time she got to spend with the monarch. </p> <p>In a tell-all interview with <a href="https://variety.com/2022/digital/features/meghan-markle-grieving-queen-elizabeth-working-harry-1235407176/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Variety</a>, the Duchess of Sussex reflected on the extraordinary events of the past month since the Queen passed, and how it affected her family.</p> <p>She said, "There’s been such an outpouring of love and support.”</p> <p>“I’m really grateful that I was able to be with my husband to support him, especially during that time."</p> <div id="indie-campaign-rHsIzpAmAj7xkA4llYlH-2" data-campaign-name="NCA ENTERTAINMENT newsletter" data-campaign-indie="newsletter-signup" data-jira="TSN-268" data-from="1640955600000" data-to="1677502800000"></div> <p>“What’s so beautiful is to look at the legacy that his grandmother was able to leave on so many fronts. Certainly, in terms of female leadership, she is the most shining example of what that looks like."</p> <p>“I feel deep gratitude to have been able to spend time with her and get to know her. </p> <p>“It’s been a complicated time, but my husband, ever the optimist, said, ‘Now she’s reunited with her husband.’”</p> <p>Meghan was also asked if she had any thoughts about her relationship with the Queen following her death. </p> <p>“I’ve reflected on that first official engagement that I had with her, how special that felt. I feel fortunate,” Meghan said.</p> <p>“And I continue to be proud to have had a nice warmth with the matriarch of the family.”</p> <p>The Duchess was also quizzed about her recent interview with The Cut, which "some found to be snarky".</p> <p>In that interview, Meghan claimed that "just by existing", her and Prince Harry were "upsetting the dynamic" of the royal family. </p> <p>Since then, she said she has had time to reflect on the story. </p> <p>She said, “Part of me is just really trusting, really open — that’s how I move in the world. I have to remember that I don’t ever want to become so jaded that that piece of me goes away. So despite any of those things? Onward. I can survive it.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Variety</em></p>

Family & Pets

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How to keep a gratitude journal

<p><strong>The benefits of gratitude </strong></p><p>Maybe you’ve heard about the potential benefits of practising gratitude or keeping a gratitude journal. You may have even been advised to keep a gratitude journal by a doctor, family, or friends.</p><p>But are there any real benefits from keeping a gratitude journal? And how exactly does gratitude journaling work?</p><p>Experts say there’s no wrong way to do gratitude exercises like keeping a gratitude journal, unless of course you’re focusing on negative things or things that can encourage shameful feelings.</p><p>Here’s what the experts want you to know about why and how to keep a gratitude journal.</p><p><strong>What is a gratitude journal?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">According to experts, a gratitude journal is typically a journal or notepad where you jot down things for which you are grateful.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">This doesn’t need to be a notepad or journal, though; it can also include listing things for which you are grateful aloud or in your mind. Some smartphone apps even allow you to text or digitally enter things you are grateful for.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“You can keep a gratitude journal on your phone, you could do it in a notebook, you could even just kind of take time to really think about those things,” says Laurie Santos, PhD, a professor of psychology.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“All of these types of forms of engaging with a gratitude journal can really improve your wellbeing.”</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>What does research show about the effects of gratitude journaling?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Experts say the evidence is overwhelming: Keeping a gratitude journal is good for your health and overall well-being.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“There’s lots and lots of studies basically suggesting that gratitude improves wellbeing,” Dr Santos says.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“There’s evidence, for example, that people who are more grateful experience more benefits in terms of their self-regulation, they’re more likely to eat healthier, they’re more likely to save more for retirement,” she explains. “And there’s even evidence that people sleep better when they’re feeling more grateful.”</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Jane Wilson, PhD, says there are even more benefits of keeping a gratitude journal.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“People who keep a gratitude journal experience more positive emotions such as love, joy, contentment, improved social connections, increased sense of inner peace, improved exercise and deepened sense of focus in learning,” Dr Wilson explains.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“Keeping a gratitude journal strengthens one’s gratitude muscle,” she adds. “By strengthening one’s gratitude muscle, people will find they more quickly notice good things in life, and they’re better able to manage future stressful situations.”</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>What is gratitude?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Dr Simon-Thomas says the most simple way to make a gratitude diary entry, very generally, is to list sources of goodness that you enjoy in your life that you haven’t had to work toward or earn.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“It can be as simple as running water that is drinkable from a tap, or can be really complex and detailed, like the role that a mentor in your life has played in advancing your professional career or by introducing you to a topic or a community that has been instrumental,” she explains.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">She says examples of this include gratitude for things many people take for granted, such as democracy, freedom, access to education and health care. “Those are really important kinds of gratitude,” she says, “and they do shift us toward a more optimistic view in the world.”</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Dr Wilson says she suggests beginning by pausing to reflect upon your day or week, taking a moment to savour a few blessings in your life, and then jotting the things you noticed or think of.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>How often should you write in a gratitude journal?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Experts say there’s no hard and fast rule about how frequently to make entries in a gratitude journal to reap the benefits.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Dr Simon-Thomas says there are some general patterns that seem to pop up like the suggestion to write three times a day, she adds, but that won’t work for everyone.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">If you’re more anxious person, maybe for you the best schedule for gratitude journaling is twice a day for two weeks. For some people who lean toward a more open-minded and flexible emotional demeanour, she says journaling once every other day for four weeks may be the most impactful.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Some research suggests the ideal frequency to write in a gratitude journal seems to be around one to three entries per week for at least two weeks. Experts say this is likely because it can become easier to become numb to sources of goodness around us if we track it every day.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>How much should you write in a journal?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">According to the experts, any amount of expression or embracing of gratitude, including writing it down in a journal, can be beneficial. But most also agree that the more specific and in-depth an entry is, the more impact it tends to have.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">Dr Simon-Thomas says some people find it helpful to go into a lot of detail as to why they are grateful for something or how it made them feel. Some experts also advocate for the benefit of making extended entries that can be shared with others.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“The most impactful gratitude practice is writing a gratitude letter to someone, around 300 to 500 words, and then reading it aloud to that person,” Dr Wilson says.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>How long do you need to keep a gratitude journal to reap the benefits?</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">The jury is still out on exactly how long you need to keep a gratitude journal to reap the benefits.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">“There’s evidence, for example, that simply scribbling down a few things that you’re grateful for every day can significantly improve your wellbeing in as little as two weeks,” Dr Santos According to some experts, about 15 days is the period at which people start experiencing long-term benefits from gratitude journaling. But Dr Simon-Thomas says there are a lot of different statements out there about the relative period of time required, adding that some studies suggest just experiencing 30 to 60 seconds of gratitude, writing or reflection, can change how someone acts in the next moment, and in the next couple hours.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>Some prompts to kick-start your gratitude journal:</strong></p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">The experts say some people have no issue coming up with things they are grateful for, but this isn’t always an easy process for everyone. For some people, even trying to think of things they are grateful for, or not being able to come up with any, can be overwhelming and make you feel hopeless.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff">If you’re having trouble thinking of entries to make in a gratitude journal, experts advise using basic prompts that help you get started in the process, although there is no perfect prompt for everyone or every situation. Some prompts may seem well-suited for a certain person or situation, but others may make someone feel worse, so choose what works for you.</p><p style="border: 0px;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;line-height: 26px;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><strong>Examples of good prompts for gratitude journal entries include:</strong></p><ul style="border: 0px;font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 15px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for a natural resource (water, food, clean air, sunlight).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for a component of the natural world (wildlife, mountains, bodies of water).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for modern comforts (running water, toilets, indoor heat, electricity, cars, airplanes, trains, grocery stores).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for institutions or services (hospitals and health care, education centres and education, emergency services like firefighters and natural disaster response services).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for a leisure activity (writing, reading, watching TV or movies).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful my body is capable of … (walking, exercising, maintaining balance and posture, recovering from illness).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful my brain is capable of … (thinking, being intelligent, being curious, having an imagination, learning new things, talking, coordinating body movement, remembering things and feelings).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for a stress-reducing activity (meditation, yoga, mindfulness, talking with friends and family).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful I am alive now because … (modern amenities and comforts, scientific breakthroughs or advancements, ability to travel around the world, ability to connect with others easier).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for basic rights such as … (freedom, civil liberties, the right to receive education, expression of thought, the right to vote).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for something that someone did to help me or make me feel more secure.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for components of my work (respect of co-workers or bosses, benefits, positive impact of work on others or the environment, feelings of fulfillment or engagement).</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful to have certain people in my life.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for my pet because …</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful for a certain experience.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">I am grateful that something happened to me today.</li></ul><p>Additional tips to keeping a gratitude journal:</p><ul style="border: 0px;font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial;font-size: 16px;margin: 0px 0px 15px 20px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline;color: #444444;background-color: #ffffff"><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Go for depth of entries versus quantity. It’s generally better to go into as much detail as possible about why you are grateful for something than generating a long, less detailed list.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Try to not simply go through the motions. Keeping a gratitude journal is more effective if you first commit, and stay committed to, being more grateful, happy, or optimistic. A gratitude journal entry should not be viewed as a to-do list or something you have to do against your will.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Don’t try to make any entry if you really aren’t ready or in a good space. Pushing yourself to simply make entries can actually make you feel worse or overwhelmed and may lead to entries that are negative or shaming.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Don’t overdo it. Many people think you have to write in a gratitude journal every day to see positive effects. But writing once or twice per week long-term may be more beneficial than daily journaling.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Think about subtractions, not only additions. One way to stimulate feelings of gratitude is to think about how your life would be affected without certain things, such as modern comforts, friends and family, meaningful work, etc. This approach can be especially effective if someone is having a hard time coming up with something they’re grateful for.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Savour surprises. Events that are surprising or unexpected often stimulate stronger feelings of gratitude.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Get personal with your entries. Recording or thinking about people you are grateful for often is more impactful than thinking about things you’re grateful for.</li><li style="border: 0px;font-family: inherit;font-style: inherit;font-weight: inherit;margin: 0px;padding: 0px;vertical-align: baseline">Think of things you’re grateful for as gifts. Thinking of things we are grateful for as gifts helps prevent many people from overlooking them or taking them for granted.</li></ul><p>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/healthsmart/conditions/mental-health/how-to-keep-a-gratitude-journal-with-16-prompts-to-help-you-get-started?pages=1">Readers Digest</a>. </p>

Mind

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How to keep a gratitude journal, with 16 prompts to help you get started

<p><strong>Benefits of gratitude</strong></p> <p>Maybe you’ve heard about the potential benefits of practising gratitude or keeping a gratitude journal. You may have even been advised to keep a gratitude journal by a doctor, family, or friends.</p> <p>But are there any real benefits from keeping a gratitude journal? And how exactly does gratitude journaling work?</p> <p>Experts say there’s no wrong way to do gratitude exercises like keeping a gratitude journal, unless of course you’re focusing on negative things or things that can encourage shameful feelings.</p> <p>Here’s what the experts want you to know about why and how to keep a gratitude journal.</p> <p><strong>What is a gratitude journal?</strong></p> <p>According to experts, a gratitude journal is typically a journal or notepad where you jot down things for which you are grateful.</p> <p>This doesn’t need to be a notepad or journal, though; it can also include listing things for which you are grateful aloud or in your mind. Some smartphone apps even allow you to text or digitally enter things you are grateful for.</p> <p>“You can keep a gratitude journal on your phone, you could do it in a notebook, you could even just kind of take time to really think about those things,” says Laurie Santos, PhD, a professor of psychology.</p> <p>“All of these types of forms of engaging with a gratitude journal can really improve your wellbeing.”</p> <p><strong>What does research show about the effects of gratitude journaling?</strong></p> <p>Experts say the evidence is overwhelming: Keeping a gratitude journal is good for your health and overall well-being.</p> <p>“There’s lots and lots of studies basically suggesting that gratitude improves wellbeing,” Dr Santos says.</p> <p>“There’s evidence, for example, that people who are more grateful experience more benefits in terms of their self-regulation, they’re more likely to eat healthier, they’re more likely to save more for retirement,” she explains. “And there’s even evidence that people sleep better when they’re feeling more grateful.”</p> <p>Jane Wilson, PhD, says there are even more benefits of keeping a gratitude journal.</p> <p>“People who keep a gratitude journal experience more positive emotions such as love, joy, contentment, improved social connections, increased sense of inner peace, improved exercise and deepened sense of focus in learning,” Dr Wilson explains.</p> <p>“Keeping a gratitude journal strengthens one’s gratitude muscle,” she adds. “By strengthening one’s gratitude muscle, people will find they more quickly notice good things in life, and they’re better able to manage future stressful situations.”</p> <p><strong>What is gratitude?</strong></p> <p>Gratitude can have many definitions depending on whom you talk to. But according to Emiliana Simon-Thomas, PhD, gratitude is often defined into two basic ways.</p> <p>“Science defines gratitude in a couple of ways,” she says.</p> <p>“One way is reverence for that which is given. Recognising that all kinds of stuff around us every day has nothing to do with our effort, talents, our skills. It’s just there.”</p> <p>She says another way we define gratitude is as a specific emotional experience.</p> <p>“So how you feel that kind of warmth in your chest, that affectionate sentiment, when you are in a moment where someone has done something that’s really wonderful for you, you feel grateful right then and there is that sense of trust and connection, and social support,” she explains.</p> <p><strong>How do I make an entry in a gratitude journal?</strong></p> <p>Dr Simon-Thomas says the most simple way to make a gratitude diary entry, very generally, is to list sources of goodness that you enjoy in your life that you haven’t had to work toward or earn.</p> <p>“It can be as simple as running water that is drinkable from a tap, or can be really complex and detailed, like the role that a mentor in your life has played in advancing your professional career or by introducing you to a topic or a community that has been instrumental,” she explains.</p> <p>She says examples of this include gratitude for things many people take for granted, such as democracy, freedom, access to education and health care. “Those are really important kinds of gratitude,” she says, “and they do shift us toward a more optimistic view in the world.”</p> <p>Dr Wilson says she suggests beginning by pausing to reflect upon your day or week, taking a moment to savour a few blessings in your life, and then jotting the things you noticed or think of.</p> <p><strong>How often should you write in a gratitude journal?</strong></p> <p>Experts say there’s no hard and fast rule about how frequently to make entries in a gratitude journal to reap the benefits.</p> <p>Dr Simon-Thomas says there are some general patterns that seem to pop up like the suggestion to write three times a day, she adds, but that won’t work for everyone.</p> <p>If you’re more anxious person, maybe for you the best schedule for gratitude journaling is twice a day for two weeks. For some people who lean toward a more open-minded and flexible emotional demeanour, she says journaling once every other day for four weeks may be the most impactful.</p> <p>Some research suggests the ideal frequency to write in a gratitude journal seems to be around one to three entries per week for at least two weeks. Experts say this is likely because it can become easier to become numb to sources of goodness around us if we track it every day.</p> <p><strong>How much should you write in a gratitude journal?</strong></p> <p>According to the experts, any amount of expression or embracing of gratitude, including writing it down in a journal, can be beneficial. But most also agree that the more specific and in-depth an entry is, the more impact it tends to have.</p> <p>Dr Simon-Thomas says some people find it helpful to go into a lot of detail as to why they are grateful for something or how it made them feel. Some experts also advocate for the benefit of making extended entries that can be shared with others.</p> <p>“The most impactful gratitude practice is writing a gratitude letter to someone, around 300 to 500 words, and then reading it aloud to that person,” Dr Wilson says.</p> <p><strong>How long do you need to keep a gratitude journal to reap the benefits?</strong></p> <p>The jury is still out on exactly how long you need to keep a gratitude journal to reap the benefits.</p> <p>“There’s evidence, for example, that simply scribbling down a few things that you’re grateful for every day can significantly improve your wellbeing in as little as two weeks,” Dr Santos According to some experts, about 15 days is the period at which people start experiencing long-term benefits from gratitude journaling. But Dr Simon-Thomas says there are a lot of different statements out there about the relative period of time required, adding that some studies suggest just experiencing 30 to 60 seconds of gratitude, writing or reflection, can change how someone acts in the next moment, and in the next couple hours.</p> <p><strong>What is gratitude fatigue?</strong></p> <p>In general, experts say expressing and embracing gratitude, and keeping a gratitude journal, are good for the well-being of most people. But like most things, some people can experience gratitude fatigue, which may cause them to feel worse about their situation or life.</p> <p>“Some people experience gratitude fatigue if they find themselves writing down the same thing each time they open their journal,” Dr Wilson says. “To remedy this, look for new [or] surprising things you’re grateful for. Or … take a break from writing things down and resume the practice after a break.”</p> <p><strong>Writing prompts for gratitude journal entries</strong></p> <p>The experts say some people have no issue coming up with things they are grateful for, but this isn’t always an easy process for everyone. For some people, even trying to think of things they are grateful for, or not being able to come up with any, can be overwhelming and make you feel hopeless.</p> <p>If you’re having trouble thinking of entries to make in a gratitude journal, experts advise using basic prompts that help you get started in the process, although there is no perfect prompt for everyone or every situation. Some prompts may seem well-suited for a certain person or situation, but others may make someone feel worse, so choose what works for you.</p> <p>Examples of good prompts for gratitude journal entries include:</p> <ul> <li>I am grateful for a natural resource (water, food, clean air, sunlight).</li> <li>I am grateful for a component of the natural world (wildlife, mountains, bodies of water).</li> <li>I am grateful for modern comforts (running water, toilets, indoor heat, electricity, cars, airplanes, trains, grocery stores).</li> <li>I am grateful for institutions or services (hospitals and health care, education centres and education, emergency services like firefighters and natural disaster response services).</li> <li>I am grateful for a leisure activity (writing, reading, watching TV or movies).</li> <li>I am grateful my body is capable of … (walking, exercising, maintaining balance and posture, recovering from illness).</li> <li>I am grateful my brain is capable of … (thinking, being intelligent, being curious, having an imagination, learning new things, talking, coordinating body movement, remembering things and feelings).</li> <li>I am grateful for a stress-reducing activity (meditation, yoga, mindfulness, talking with friends and family).</li> <li>I am grateful I am alive now because … (modern amenities and comforts, scientific breakthroughs or advancements, ability to travel around the world, ability to connect with others easier).</li> <li>I am grateful for basic rights such as … (freedom, civil liberties, the right to receive education, expression of thought, the right to vote).</li> <li>I am grateful for something that someone did to help me or make me feel more secure.</li> <li>I am grateful for components of my work (respect of co-workers or bosses, benefits, positive impact of work on others or the environment, feelings of fulfillment or engagement).</li> <li>I am grateful to have certain people in my life.</li> <li>I am grateful for my pet because …</li> <li>I am grateful for a certain experience.</li> <li>I am grateful that something happened to me today.</li> </ul> <p><strong>Other tips for keeping a gratitude journal</strong></p> <ul> <li>Go for depth of entries versus quantity. It’s generally better to go into as much detail as possible about why you are grateful for something than generating a long, less detailed list.</li> <li>Try to not simply go through the motions. Keeping a gratitude journal is more effective if you first commit, and stay committed to, being more grateful, happy, or optimistic. A gratitude journal entry should not be viewed as a to-do list or something you have to do against your will.</li> <li>Don’t try to make any entry if you really aren’t ready or in a good space. Pushing yourself to simply make entries can actually make you feel worse or overwhelmed and may lead to entries that are negative or shaming.</li> <li>Don’t overdo it. Many people think you have to write in a gratitude journal every day to see positive effects. But writing once or twice per week long-term may be more beneficial than daily journaling.</li> <li>Think about subtractions, not only additions. One way to stimulate feelings of gratitude is to think about how your life would be affected without certain things, such as modern comforts, friends and family, meaningful work, etc. This approach can be especially effective if someone is having a hard time coming up with something they’re grateful for.</li> <li>Savour surprises. Events that are surprising or unexpected often stimulate stronger feelings of gratitude.</li> <li>Get personal with your entries. Recording or thinking about people you are grateful for often is more impactful than thinking about things you’re grateful for.</li> <li>Think of things you’re grateful for as gifts. Thinking of things we are grateful for as gifts helps prevent many people from overlooking them or taking them for granted.</li> </ul> <p><em><span style="font-weight: 400;">Written by Jennifer Hiuzen. This article first appeared in </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/healthsmart/conditions/mental-health/how-to-keep-a-gratitude-journal-with-16-prompts-to-help-you-get-started" target="_blank"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Reader’s Digest</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, </span><a rel="noopener" href="http://readersdigest.innovations.com.au/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&amp;utm_medium=articles&amp;utm_campaign=RDSUB&amp;keycode=WRA87V" target="_blank"><span style="font-weight: 400;">here’s our best subscription offer.</span></a></em></p> <p><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

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Daughter shares heartfelt tribute to her single dad

<p>Single mums (rightfully) get a lot of thanks and attention from their family, the community and even the media, but one appreciative daughter has reminded us all why single dads are just as important. Tiana Sheehan has taken to <a href="https://www.facebook.com/lovewhatreallymatters/posts/1461901193832274" target="_blank"><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Facebook</span></strong></a> to share her thanks for the sacrifices her single father has made over the years to raise her into the strong woman she is today.</p> <p>She described a recent trip to the supermarket when she overheard a mother and daughter shopping for razors. It reminded her of the first time she shaved her legs – but it wasn’t her mother who taught her. Tiana’s mum passed away 14 years ago, so all the teenage girl lessons and milestones were now the responsibility of her doting dad.</p> <p>“I'll never forget the look on my dad's face when I told him I wanted to shave my legs,” she writes. “I remember coming up to dad and being so embarrassed to ask him for help, but man, did he handle it like a champ!</p> <p>“For a moment, he put his head down; and then he turned the TV off, took me into the bathroom, gave me a new blade on his razor, gave me his shaving cream, and taught me how to shave my legs.”</p> <p>Throughout the post, she shares all the not-so-comfortable parts of growing up that she was guided through by her father, but admitting that, thanks to him, she couldn’t have had a better childhood. “My dad was so good at fulfilling both roles and making sure my childhood was as normal as possible,” she says. “[He] handled everything – periods, shaving, broken hearts, catty girlfriends… you name it and my dad took it like a champ.”</p> <p>Tiana’s story, which has received more than 26,000 likes and 1,500 shares, has inspired others raised by single fathers to take the opportunity to give thanks to their own dads. “My mum passed away when I was 6 years old and my dad raised me alone,” one commenter said. “He was the best mum/dad ever.”</p> <p>Tiana finished the post with a heart-warming shout-out to her dad, thanking him for “never, ever, ever being too much of a man” to be her mum. “Thank you for never being too embarrassed to do the girl stuff you had to do, thank you for never making it embarrassing for me to ask you for help,” she gushes. “Growing up without a mom is obviously something no one ever wants, but growing up with you was the best. I love you, Dad!”</p>

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How to master the attitude of gratitude

<p><strong><em>Judy Freedman is an award-winning blogger, social media influencer and communications consultant, her passions include traveling, bicycling, mindfulness meditation and yoga. Here Judy shares her story about making gratitude part of her daily life.</em></strong></p> <p>Tomorrow will mark eight years since my husband M died. As my grief instructor S said shortly after M’s passing: “The hole in your heart will get smaller, but it will never fully close.” S was right.</p> <p>My life has evolved a great deal since those dark days of December 2007. One of the biggest behaviours that has created positive change in my life after 50 is having an attitude of gratitude. Like yoga and mindfulness, having an attitude of gratitude is an awareness practice. With gratitude I’m learning to have more contentment for all the things I have and all the things I can do, versus being disappointed with the things I don’t have or can’t do.</p> <p>For example, when I see my friends celebrating their 25th or 30th wedding anniversaries sometimes I am sad that M and I will never have an opportunity to achieve such a milestone. Then the gratitude meter checks in and I become grateful for the 24 years we did have together. It’s more than many couples get, especially with the rate of divorce in this country.</p> <p><strong>Wearing gratitude on my wrist</strong><br /> I wear a MyIntent bracelet on my wrist with the word “GRATITUDE.” It acts as a constant prompt to be thankful for all the things I can do. “Breathe because you can,” said my yoga teacher N in today’s class. N is right, I am grateful that I can breathe. I chose the word GRATITUDE for MyIntent bracelet.</p> <p><strong>A bucket full of gratitude</strong><br /> If I could hold all my gratitude in a container, it would fill up a huge bucket. In that bucket would be my daughter A and my son D, my boyfriend L, my BFF L and BFF R, my sister N, my late mom and dad, and many more friends and family members. I’d add the gratitude for my beautiful home and my condo on the corner at the shore, top that with my yoga and meditation practice, and for the retirement I earned from my full-time job that is enabling me to live life to the fullest during my second act. There’s more, more, more gratitude for you, my blog readers who bring me great joy each week when we connect through my posts.</p> <p>Ah yes, the gratitude bucket sometimes gets blown over by negative thoughts that creep in, especially when the aches and pains of my aging body act up or I see more wrinkles on my face. Then I remember that gratitude is a practice and it’s not going to be perfect every day.</p> <p><strong>The benefits of a gratitude practice</strong><br /> Nancy Rones, from Yoga Journal wrote that “Practicing gratitude four times a week – by keeping a gratitude diary and listening to a guided recording for fostering gratefulness in life – lowered study participants’ levels of depression and stress and increased their happiness within three weeks, according to a recent Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine study.” Wow, in less than a month this little practice can boost happiness!</p> <p>For sure when I honour M tomorrow evening at our temple services, my gratitude bucket will be full as I hold him close in my heart. The tears may shed as they usually do, yet the framed quote that hangs in my office will remind me of how truly grateful I am to have had M in my life for each of the 24 years I did. As it says, “When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.”</p> <p>Read more from Judy's blog<em><strong><a href="http://aboomerslifeafter50.com/" target="_blank"> here.</a><br /></strong></em></p> <p><strong>Related links:</strong></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong><em><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/retirement-life/2016/01/should-you-practise-retirement/">Should you “practise” retirement?</a></em></strong></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong><em><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/retirement-life/2016/01/how-to-find-a-hobby-you-love/">How to find a hobby you love</a></em></strong></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong><em><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/retirement-life/2016/01/benefits-of-living-in-a-retirement-village/">The benefits of living in a retirement village</a></em></strong></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong> </strong></span></p> <p> </p>

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30 things to thank your grandmother for

<p>It doesn’t matter if you’re a grandmother or if you just have a grandmother, these 30 things are why they are so special to us and we need to give our gratitude to our grannies.</p> <ol> <li>She gives the best hugs.</li> <li>A grandma always knows what to say to make things better.</li> <li>Let’s be honest, you’ve never left your grandma’s house hungry or empty handed.</li> <li>She gives you a unique perspective on life.</li> <li>She’s one of your biggest fans.</li> <li>And she’s the greatest listener.</li> <li>The cookie jar is never empty at grandma’s house.</li> <li>She is the classiest woman.</li> <li>Her stories are one of a kind.</li> <li>She told you were beautiful even when you didn’t feel like it.</li> <li>A grandma never forgets your birthday.</li> <li>She always makes you feel special and good about yourself.</li> <li>If you’re ever feeling sick or in danger, she will take care of you.</li> <li>She taught you how to speak your mind when necessary and to stand up for what’s right.</li> <li>A handwritten letter from your grandma never fails to make your day.</li> <li>She knows how to rock a pair of glasses, so if you need some in the future, it’s totally fine. Like grandmother, like granddaughter.</li> <li>Her advice is genuine and wise.</li> <li>You can always count on her to be there for you, even in the worst of times.</li> <li>She taught you how to have self-respect.</li> <li>Her cooking is absolutely delicious.</li> <li>A grandma teaches you to be brave even when you’re scared.</li> <li>She’s one of the strongest women you know.</li> <li>Her voice and contagious laughter will always lift your spirits.</li> <li>She encourages you to push beyond your limits.</li> <li>She accepts you for who you truly are.</li> <li>What would you do without her words of wisdom and comfort?</li> <li>She helps you prepare for the best and the worst.</li> <li>A grandma is continuously there for you with a selfless heart.</li> <li>She’s the anchor that keeps you grounded.</li> <li>She always delivers on her promises and teaches you to do the same.</li> </ol> <p><strong>Related links:</strong></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong><em><a href="/lifestyle/relationships/2015/12/octogenarian-couple-get-married/"></a></em></strong></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/01/best-advice-ever-received-video/">People aged 5 to 105 reveal the best advice they’ve ever received</a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="/lifestyle/relationships/2015/12/octogenarian-couple-get-married/"></a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/01/photos-of-animals-hitchhiking/">Hilarious photos of animals hitchhiking</a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="/lifestyle/relationships/2015/12/octogenarian-couple-get-married/"></a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2015/12/cheap-school-holiday-activities/">30 cheap – or free – holiday activities to do with grandkids</a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="/lifestyle/relationships/2015/12/octogenarian-couple-get-married/"> </a></strong></em></span></p>

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The attitude of gratitude

<p>We’re all guilty of having days where we wake up in a funk, focus on the negative, worry about the things we don't have control over and simply feel sorry for ourselves! After all, we’re only human and our feelings of gratitude can ebb and flow.</p><p>While life is not always easy and can throw obstacles our way that challenge us and make it difficult for us to be thankful, there are times when we need to focus on the positive and what we have to be thankful for. Mastering the attitude of gratitude is an art however.</p><p>If you want to start attracting positive things into your life you need to start showing your gratitude, appreciation and love for the people and things around you everyday. There are a number of ways to do this including spending five minutes a day jotting down the things you are grateful for in a gratitude journal. By acknowledging what you are grateful for, you'll become an attractor of positive feelings. As more of your thoughts and words become positive, you'll start attracting more positive people and circumstances, too.</p><p>Getting in the habit of approaching life with gratitude is becoming a trend that is working for many, including the likes of Oprah and Martha Stewart.&nbsp;Both ladies have been quite open about their attitude toward gratitude, with Oprah talking about keeping a gratitude journal of her own. “I started out giving thanks for small things,” she explains, adding “and the more grateful I became, the more my bounty increased. That's because what you focus on expands, and when you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it. Opportunities, relationships and even money flowed my way when I learnt to be thankful no matter what happened in my life.”&nbsp;</p><p>Oprah says to list at least five things per day that you’re grateful for and include the little things, too. “My list includes small pleasures: the feel of the grass under my feet; a walk in the woods with my dogs; cooking fried green tomatoes and eating them hot; reading a good book and knowing another awaits,” she reveals.</p><p>Getting into this habit, Oprah asserts, take a little time. “It's not easy being grateful all the time. But it's when you feel least thankful that you are most in need of what gratitude can give you: perspective. Just knowing you have that daily list to complete allows you to look at your day differently, with an awareness of every sweet gesture and kind thought passed your way.”</p><p>Also a fan of a positive mindset, Martha Stewart says practicing gratitude is a chance to turn everything in life into a celebration. “Offering gratitude is a way to open yourself up to giving and receiving more blessings,” she articulates. “For our ancestors, gratitude was ingrained, and as a result, every aspect of life presented an occasion for celebration. Sometimes all it takes is a simple ceremony to put us in touch with all we do have in our lives.”</p><p><strong>3 tips for mastering the attitude of gratitude:</strong></p><p><strong>Tell five people you are grateful for them</strong></p><p>Tell five people that you are grateful for them and be very detailed in what you are grateful for. Speak from your heart and tell them how much they mean to you and why. DO NOT DO THIS OVER EMAIL. Part of the joy in this exercise is witnessing the joy on someone’s face. You can choose anyone from your husband to your gardener who helps keep your home looking wonderful. When you see how grateful these people are to be acknowledged, you will feel&nbsp;super grateful to have them in your life!</p><p><strong>Lend a helping hand</strong></p><p>Stepping outside of your own headspace is the quickest way to shake yourself out of funk and not feel sorry for yourself. There are always people facing challenges that are far worse than ours. While this is all relative, if we can walk away from our worries for a day, we often discover that we have more to be grateful for than we thought. There is nothing more gratifying than giving in some way to people who are in need of help. Consider spending a day at a homeless shelter or a nursing home. You will feel grateful that you did!</p><p><strong>Start a daily gratitude journal</strong></p><p>At the very least, attempt to keep a journal for 30 days. Take a few minutes each day and write&nbsp;everything&nbsp;you are grateful for! Write things from your family to the activities you partake in, the fresh food you eat, even your computer that enables you to keep in touch.Everything, even down to the small things we forget to be thankful for! You will start to notice a shift in energy. Remember, we get more of what we focus on, so let that be gratitude.</p>

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