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Alleged motive of man who scalded baby revealed

A friend of the Chinese national man who has been accused of scalding nine-month-old baby Luka in a Brisbane park has revealed his potential motive. On August 27th, baby Luka was in Hanlon Park with his mother when a man approached them and poured hot coffee over the infant, leaving him with lifelong injuries. The man has since been <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/health/caring/man-accused-of-scalding-baby-in-park-identified" target="_blank" rel="noopener">identified</a> as a 33-year-old Chinese national who was in Australia on a student visa. Now, a friend of the man has claimed the horrific attack on the baby was because he sought “revenge on white people” after he was denied another Australian visa. “Finally, he vented his anger and [allegedly] hurt a baby before leaving Australia,” reported China’s New Tang Dynasty Television, adding that Luka was “probably [attacked] to take revenge on the white people.” As the man has now been identified by Queensland Police, Luka's parents, who have wished to remain anonymous throughout the ordeal, have new questions as they continue their fight for justice. “Where is he now? Is he in jail now that the media knows who he is over there? Is he just walking the streets?” the mother posed to 9News. Luka's father added, “We just want him to be punished, here or there, we just want him to be punished.” The man allegedly fled the scene after gravely injuring the child and drove over the state border to Sydney, where he flew out of the country on August 31st. Queensland Police have since put an arrest warrant out for the man for intending to cause grievous bodily harm, which carried a maximum penalty of a life sentence. Speaking to 4BC Radio on Thursday morning, Acting Assistant Police Commissioner Andrew Massingham said police were “very much committed” to arresting the man. “Our international search continues for the person that committed that horrendous crime,” he said. “That child will have those injuries for life.” Queensland Police Detective Inspector Paul Dalton previously revealed the man fled the country just 12 hours after they identified him. “Detectives are devastated that they missed this person by 12 hours. I was deflated, but that deflation quickly turns into determination and resilience to get the job done.” Image credits: Queensland Police

Caring

Motive and cause of death revealed after six found dead in luxury hotel

Six people found dead in a luxury hotel room in central Bangkok are believed to have died due to poisoning, according to Thai police. Authorities shared photo of the teacups found in the room on the fifth floor of the hotel, revealing they found traces of cyanide in the cups. The bodies of two American and four Vietnamese nationals were found by hotel staff on Tuesday evening, after staff entered the room to inform them it was past check out time. The group, made up of three men and three women aged between 37 and 56, likely drank from tea and coffee cups laced with cyanide following a dispute linked to bad investments, Thai police said on Wednesday. Photos of the crime scene released by authorities show a lack of struggle and violence, instead showing bodies scattered around the room among plates of untouched food, and two thermos flasks and cups. Initial examinations revealed the presence of cyanide in six cups, according to police. “The mouths and nails on all the bodies turned purple, showing a lack of air could be a joint reason of the cause of the death,” forensic doctor Kornkiat Vongpaisarnsin, told a press conference at the Chulalongkorn University. “We presume they all died from cyanide which causes a lack of air in some organs,” he added. Authorities initially said they were searching for a seventh person who was part of the hotel booking, but on Wednesday they dismissed this line of inquiry, saying they believe one of the dead people poisoned the others with the deadly fast-acting chemical cyanide. “We are convinced that one of the six people found dead committed this crime,” said Noppasil Poonsawas, a deputy commander of Bangkok police. That person, police said, had ordered the food and tea to the room and “looked under stress” when staff arrived. After conducting interviews with hotel staff, Noppasin said one of the members of the group was alone in the room when the food arrived and was later joined by the other guests. He added that the incident was likely linked to a “personal matter” and not related to organised crime as interviews carried out with relatives of the dead indicated a dispute over debt. “One of the relatives said one of the deceased was an investment agent and all (the deceased) invested, but the business was not going as expected. They made an appointment to discuss the matter in Thailand,” Noppasin said. Police believe that the woman who poisoned the group did so after she accrued huge debts related to an investment in a hospital in Japan, according to police sources cited by Vietnamese media. She had allegedly convinced a married couple and two other victims among the dead to pour funds into the project, but they had reportedly lost roughly $280,000 AUD as a result. Tran Dinh Dung, the father of one of the victims, said his 37-year-old son was due to return to Vietnam last Sunday. “I kept calling him but couldn’t get through so I was very worried, but I didn’t expect him to die in Thailand,” Dung said in an interview with Vietnam’s Thanh Nien newspaper. “Phu’s mother has fainted countless times, she could not bear this shock,” he said. Image credits: AFP/Anusak Laowilas/NurPhoto/Shutterstock Editorial

Legal

Why you shouldn’t let guilt motivate you to exercise

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/martin-j-turner-489218">Martin J Turner</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/manchester-metropolitan-university-860">Manchester Metropolitan University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anthony-miller-679114">Anthony Miller</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/staffordshire-university-1381">Staffordshire University</a> The hardest part of consistently exercising is finding the motivation to do it. But using the wrong type of motivation for your workouts could militate against you – and could even have consequences for your mental health. Our research, which <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/02640414.2022.2042124">investigated the motivations</a> of 650 frequent exercisers, found that people who believed things like “I am a loser if I do not succeed in things that matter to me” and “I have to be viewed favourably by people that matter to me” were more likely to use self-pressure and wanting to avoid guilt as motivation to exercise. Not only was this group more likely to not want to exercise at all, we also found that those who used guilt and self-pressure as motivation were at greater risk of experiencing poor mental health. The tendency to hold dogmatic beliefs like “I must” or “I have to”, and harmful beliefs about yourself creates a negative and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/10413200.2018.1446472?casa_token=ObBghnn3ab4AAAAA%3ATpiEvunYBqKbIqI2_kuC5fM2zMvhhYLP72TVplW3Noc4PYhQUaMBkq1pEabaXXid0hwnE3R5kNYvnA">unhealthy approach to exercise</a>. But the darker side of this mindset is that people who held these beliefs reported higher symptoms of anxiety, depression and stress compared with exercisers who didn’t use self-pressure and guilt as motivation. While it’s possible that people already experiencing poor mental health would be more likely to have negative beliefs about themselves, there’s a deeply reciprocal relationship between mental health and how we think and act. Research shows that extreme, rigid, negative ways of thinking are <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26609889/">risk factors for mental health problems</a>. Repeating negative thoughts many times, over many years, can lead to deep self-loathing which can corrode your <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2019-59628-001">mental health</a> and leave you in a continuous state of <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/02640414.2022.2042124">stress and depression</a>. It can also make you even less likely to positively change your thinking and <a href="https://journals.humankinetics.com/view/journals/tsp/8/3/article-p248.xml">exercise habits</a>. On the other hand, our study found that people who reported lower symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress had significantly less extreme, rigid and negative ways of thinking. These participants were less likely to endorse ways of thinking that involved self-demands (“I must”), magnification (“things are awful”), and self-condemnation (“I am a failure”). These exercisers reported using more useful forms of motivation to workout, such as exercising because they loved the activity and recognised the value and importance of exercise as a part of their identity. These findings show us just how important the thoughts you use to motivate your workouts can be, especially when it comes to your mental health. One solution to these ways of thinking is a psychological approach called <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.01423/full">rational emotive behaviour therapy</a> (REBT). REBT aims to understand and challenge deeply held beliefs and develop helpful alternatives. This approach may help an exerciser go from “I have to exercise” and “I’d be worthless if I didn’t exercise” to thinking “I really want to exercise, but if I didn’t exercise, I would be disappointed, but I would not be worthless.” Improving a person’s beliefs about exercise can change their motivation from being centred on self-pressure and guilt to seeing the value and potential enjoyment in working out. There are many <a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Rational-Practitioner-Performance-Psychologists-Practicing/dp/1032060409">ideas and tools</a> we can apply from REBT even without having to step foot inside a psychologist’s office. So if you find yourself falling into this cycle of self-loathing and losing motivation to exercise, here’s what you can do. <h2>Think critically about your thinking</h2> When you think about exercising, are your thoughts negative, unhelpful and self-pressuring? Be more critical of your thoughts about exercise, and ask yourself whether they make sense – and if they’re helping you. If the answer is no, try to work on adopting thoughts that do make sense and help you achieve your exercise goals, such as seeing exercise as something to enjoy, instead of something you have to do out of guilt. Being able to challenge your own unhelpful beliefs, and learning to harness more helpful ones, can help you <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1111/sms.12926?casa_token=fbVymZ3SxrAAAAAA:SiNRAlz0Xh11xbeWDUtxjwlP40gDfurptgas5SSHYLtLD9v06uLm8ztlTvi1AnwTSvTReT_u-fdgiJ0h">achieve your goals</a>. <h2>Realise you’re not what you do</h2> As human beings, we’re imperfect. We mess up – but we also do great things. When things don’t go to plan, it’s important to try and accept this. And remember that failing doesn’t mean you’re a failure. Realise that you aren’t <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1469029222001662">defined by your shortcomings</a>. Recognising that failing does not make you a failure may help you better bounce back from times when you fall short of your goals and expectations and keep on track with reaching your goals and finding solutions. <h2>Harness the power of want</h2> You’re far more likely to stick to your exercise goals if you <a href="https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/1997_RyanFrederickLepesRubioSheldon.pdf">want to do them</a>. Find an activity that offers you something more than just exercise. Perhaps join an exercise group where you can make new friends or rekindle your passion for something you used to do. If you’re only exercising because you believe you have to or to avoid guilt, then you probably won’t stick with it. Nobody likes to be pressured into doing difficult things. Finding an activity you don’t have to force yourself to do may help you move from seeing exercise as something you have to do to something you love to do. Exercise is, of course, important, but guilting yourself into doing it will probably do more harm than good. The best way is by finding things you enjoy, accepting yourself unconditionally if your motivation does wane, and removing “have to” from your thoughts about exercise.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/220342/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/martin-j-turner-489218">Martin J Turner</a>, Reader in Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/manchester-metropolitan-university-860">Manchester Metropolitan University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anthony-miller-679114">Anthony Miller</a>, Senior Lecturer in Sport and Exercise Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/staffordshire-university-1381">Staffordshire University</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-you-shouldnt-let-guilt-motivate-you-to-exercise-220342">original article</a>.

Body

Police finally reveal motive behind murder of campers Russell Hill and Carol Clay

Police have alleged that the two secret lover campers, Russel Hill and Carol Clay, were "childhood sweethearts" who had started their affair 15 years ago. In a summary of the case against Gregory Lynn, who allegedly killed the pair, police believe that Mr Hill and Ms Clay had rekindled their romance 15 years prior, and would go on regular camping trips to "spend time together". The pair allegedly drifted apart and had children with other partners, according to the documents provided to the Melbourne Magistrates’ Court on Tuesday. Mr Hill was married to another woman for 51 years, and according to the police facts provided to the court, his wife believed that he had gone camping alone. “Those close to them believe that they kept their relationship a secret to spare Hill’s family from distress,” the police statement read. The pair had gone camping in Wonnangatta Valley on March 19 2020, and they vanished sometime after 6 pm the next day. Police alleged that Mr Lynn killed the pair after an altercation over a drone, with Mr Hill fatally stabbed and Ms Clay shot in the head. Police also believed that he returned to the area in May and November 2020 to try and "destroy" evidence by setting the pair's remains on fire. Their bodies were buried around 40km from the campsite in Dargo on November 2021. Mr Lynn was in the Melbourne Magistrates’ Court this week for a committal hearing to decide whether there is enough evidence for him to stand trial in the Supreme Court. Images: Victoria Police

News

"We are a better country than that": PM condemns "racially motivated" killing

WARNING: Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander viewers are warned that the following story contains images of deceased persons. The heartbroken mother of Cassius Turvey has thanked Prime Minister Anthony Albanese for condemning the racially motivated brutal murder of her son. The 15-year-old year 9 student was walking home from school in Middle Swan, Perth when he was allegedly viciously attacked by a metal pole by a 21-year-old Jack Steven James Brearley. His head injuries were so severe and Cassius was placed in an induced coma after suffering two strokes and a brain bleed. Unfortunately, Cassius could not pull through from his horrific injuries and passed away on October 23. Mr Albanese condemned the attack and said Australia can do better. “This attack that, clearly, is racially motivated just breaks your heart,” he said. “We are a better country than that, and my heart goes out to the family and the friends.” Cassius’ mother Mechelle Turvey thanked Mr Albanese for his comments and said “it’s the words the country has been waiting for”. "They're just words but they mean so much to us," she said. "It's like you're on the same page as our hearts." Rallies were held across major cities in Australia and even Los Angeles as they called for justice for Cassius. "He's not just my loss, he's everyone's loss, even people that didn't know him," Michelle continued. "This is the worst thing to happen but this is just amazing, it's just bringing the community together. "This is black and white, you can see the diversity of people here." Jack Steven James Brearley, 21, has been charged with his murder and is due to face a Perth court next month. Images: Nine

News

‘They’re really keen for us to do better than they did’: how refugee parents motivate their kids’ learning

Refugees struggle to find meaningful employment in Australia. In 2010, the <a href="https://www.refugeecouncil.org.au/what-works-report/">Refugee Council of Australia </a> found people who came to Australia on refugee or humanitarian visas remained “the worst off of the migrant visa groups” when it came to employment. Around 12% were unemployed 18 months after arrival, compared to 8% of those who came on family visas. Education – and particularly opportunities for university education – gives people with a refugee background the <a href="https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F978-981-13-0420-0">means to significantly improve</a> their lives and socioeconomic status. People with refugee backgrounds hope for a better life for their children than the one they had, and they see education as crucial step in this journey. But we know little about the role refugee parents play in influencing their children’s educational and long-term success. My research focused on refugee families whose children performed well in school and university. We interviewed 50 refugee parents, children and their teachers to find out whether particular values of refugee families influenced the children educationally. We found parents who took the refugee journey to secure a good life for their family indirectly influenced their children to work hard like they did, and to strive for the kind of life denied to them. <h2>‘They wanted us to make something of ourselves’</h2> The parents who participated in the research varied in their levels of education – from no formal schooling to having a PhD. Most parents did the interview in their first language with either a professional interpreter, a bilingual school services officer or an adult child interpreting. Their cultural backgrounds varied widely too: interviewees included refugees from Afghanistan, Nepal, Rwanda, Syria, Vietnam and Bhutan. While all parents were first-generation refugees, the time their children had spent in Australia varied too: some had been born here, others came here as a child, while some arrived more recently as an adolescent. <a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/437681/original/file-20211215-17-1gn2lix.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=1000&fit=clip"><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/437681/original/file-20211215-17-1gn2lix.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" alt="Girl taking care of baby sister at refugee camp in Bangladesh." /></a> Refugee families have the shared understanding they can’t take their life in Australia for granted. <a href="https://www.shutterstock.com/image-photo/coxs-bazar-bangladesh-october-10-2017-735839761" class="source">Shutterstock</a> The refugee parents generally had high hopes for the opportunities education could provide for their children because they were denied the right to it in their home country or in refugee camps. From the interviews with the children, we found the parents’ high values around education motivated their children to put more effort into learning. Interpreter for Afghanistan-born parent Ahmad told us: <blockquote> The main inspiration for [the parent] is that no one in his family had an opportunity to have a higher education. So, his children will be the first one in his family that […] will be educated enough […] with a higher qualification […] They can’t help them with their [child’s] learning, but the only thing that they provide is to care about them. They advise them about their education, how you can be successful through education […] </blockquote> The children, both at a younger age and as adults, were very aware of their parents’ impact on their ability to achieve well academically. But the parental motivation didn’t cross over into pressure. Alayna, who is 12 years old, was born in Iran to Hazara parents. She said she was confident her parents would still be proud of her chasing her own dreams, even if they didn’t align with theirs. <blockquote> My mum really wants me to be a doctor because doctor is a good job, and […] if I don’t choose to be a dentist or a doctor or a teacher (I can still be) a useful person for the world, they will be totally proud of me. </blockquote> Shipa in her 20s, born in Nepal to Bhutanese parents of Nepalese ethnicity, told us: <blockquote> A strong message from my family that I have to study (because) without education, there’s nothing […] but they also have trust (that) I can do it. It’s really positive and very exciting to be […] at the university as a refugee with uneducated parents […] I just wanted to be an educated girl. </blockquote> Ester, who is 18 years old, was born in Tanzania to Burundian parents. She said: <blockquote> They just wanted us to focus on school […] they’re really keen for us to do better than they did […] because we’ve got an opportunity to come to Australia […] they didn’t want us to waste it. They wanted us to […] make something of ourselves. </blockquote> <iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5bZR7UDWVk8?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe> <h2>Parents don’t need to be directly involved</h2> Refugee parents have barriers to getting <a href="https://www.education.sa.gov.au/sites/default/files/towards-best-practice-parent-involvement.pdf?acsf_files_redirect">involved in their child’s education</a> in the same way local parents do. For instance, some local parents volunteer in learning activities or attend informal meetings about school-related issues. They may help with homework and regularly meet with their child’s teacher. Refugee parents often face cultural and language barriers when it comes to these ways of offering support. But they act as indirect influences in their children’s lives. They do so through raising a child in a family with a history of taking risks for a more secure and better life, and one that regularly communicates this shared history and the aspirations that come from it with their children. In this way, children are more likely to confidently pursue their own aspirations while valuing those of their parents. They are intrinsically self-motivated with a strong belief in their own abilities.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/172308/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/hannah-soong-161771">Hannah Soong</a>, Senior Lecturer and Socio-cultural researcher, UniSA Education Futures, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-south-australia-1180">University of South Australia</a> This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/theyre-really-keen-for-us-to-do-better-than-they-did-how-refugee-parents-motivate-their-kids-learning-172308">original article</a>. Image: Shutterstock

Family & Pets

Aaron Cockman reveals motive behind Margaret River massacre in heartbreaking interview

The man who lost all four of his children after their grandfather shot them in their sleep before turning the gun on himself broke down in tears last night as he remembered his “beautiful kids”. In an emotional interview on Channel 7’s Sunday Night, Aaron Cockman explained the circumstances he believes led his former father-in-law, Peter Miles, to commit Australia’s worst mass shooting since the Port Arthur massacre. Miles murder Taye, 13, Rylan, 12, Ayre, 10 and Kayden, 8, their mother Katrina Miles, and grandmother Cynda Miles at home in Osmington, a rural region near Margaret River in Western Australia. <img width="444" height="333" src="https://cdn.newsapi.com.au/image/v1/dd2acd5c6de2e0e605736776faacf470" alt="A picture of the family Funeral Service for Peter and Cynda Miles, Katrina, Taye, Rylan, Arye and Kadyn. Picture: Colin Murty/The Australian" style="display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"/> Mr Cockman described the heartbreaking moment he found out his children were dead. “I’m working on a job site, and I just looked at my phone then I hear this message from the police saying, ‘Can we talk to you?’” he said. His colleagues, who had learned of the news on the radio, asked if he had heard that four kids and three adults had died. “My heart just dropped,” he said. “And I said, ‘Yeah, I think that’s my kids’. I said, ‘I’ve got the police coming here now.’” “I still can’t believe that this is even happening,” Mr Cockman said. Mr Cockman said the pressure of a custody dispute over the children caused strain on both families. “The children started to be groomed to hate us and to hate Aaron,” said Mr Cockman’s mother Kim. “And that … that was wicked.” Mr Cockman thinks his former father-in-law killed his family to “solve the problem” surrounding the shared care of the children and because he did not want the kids to be saddened by his own death. “It solves the problem. It solves his problem. How do I get rid of myself without everyone, all the kids suffering,” Mr Cockman said. “If you actually thought in your head that you just cannot possibly live anymore. I just want to kill myself, I want to kill myself, but I can't, but I can't, because I don't want the kids to suffer.” Peter Miles was being treated for depression after one of his sons had killed himself and another was taken seriously ill with kidney failure. Neighbour Felicity Haynes said: “It was known that he was seeking psychological help and psychologists had prescribed antidepressants.” She said Cynda Miles was showing the strain when she returned for visiting her son Neil in hospital and said there were “other things happening at home”. “I do think she was referring to the fact that Peter was being fairly irrational,” Ms Haynes said. Mr Cockman’s mother believes Mr Miles killed the kids so they couldn’t be with Aaron. “He wanted those children to be with him and Cynda,” she said. “He would have to kill them all so that they weren't left on their own with Aaron. That's how much he hated Aaron.” Mr Miles left a bizarre suicide note on the kitchen table that read: “Ex-husband, Aaron Cockman to have house content.” <img width="425" height="319" src="https://cdn.newsapi.com.au/image/v1/051b9665f38bffde9e0e12a3915a070f" alt="The bizarre suicide note left by Peter Miles. Picture: Supplied" style="display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"/> Mr Cockman said he believes his children would still be alive if family court orders had been enforced, as he is convinced it was the long, drawn out court battle that led to Mr Miles’ demise. “Myself and the kids and Kat, and even Peter and Cynda suffered so much through the court system. “And for Peter to actually take on a farm with all my kids on it and be the father figure, it's a lot of pressure on someone that is not mentally capable and shouldn't be in that situation.” “I’m going to put all my effort into that,” Mr Cockman said. “I’ve got nothing else now.” Lifeline – 13 11 14

Mind

Dad's adorable motivation video for daughter's first day of school

Do you remember your first day of school? It’s one of the most nerve-wracking – yet exciting – experiences in a child’s life. But one US dad has come up with a beautiful and empowering way of sending his little girl off into the world, and it will warm your heart. A video of the pair has gone viral, showing the dad encouraging his daughter in the mirror, repeating inspirational words of motivation. “Look at yourself. Look in your eyes. You've got to see it. You've got to believe it,” he tells his daughter. “You ready for school? Is it going to be a good day? Are you going to be positive?” “I am strong,” she repeats back to him “I am smart. I work hard. I am beautiful. I am respectful.” Watch the full video above, it definitely has us inspired! Tell us in the comments below, how did you motivate your kids when they were starting school? Related links: <a href="/news/news/2016/09/3-year-old-girl-gives-herself-the-cutest-pep-talk/">3-year-old girl gives herself the cutest pep talk in front of the mirror</a> <a href="/news/news/2016/09/2-year-old-dinosaur-expert/">2-year-old dinosaur expert will make your day</a> <a href="/news/news/2016/09/jamie-oliver-shares-beautiful-new-pic-of-baby-river/">Jamie Oliver shares beautiful new pic of baby River</a>

News

7 motivational tactics from grandkids

Adult life can be hard! While it can be tempting to think that the only way to solve our problems is through consulting other adults, looking to the younger generation can actually be just as effective. Here are some strategies you can borrow from your grandkids to help move onwards and upwards. <ol> <li>Be the hero of your own story – Kids are the centre of their own universe, which gives them a great sense of power and influence. Picturing yourself as a proactive, conquering warrior can do wonders for your mindset.</li> <li>Always ask “why?” – Yes, it can be maddening to hear “but why?” for the millionth time but our kids are actually onto something. Asking ourselves why we need/want/do something can help uncover our true intentions and in turn, our motivating purpose.</li> <li>Seize the day – Children perceive time very differently to adults. We often spend time dwelling on the past or worrying about the future where as children only focus on the present, something we can all work on making more of a focus in our lives.</li> <li>Give it a go – New experiences are one of the greatest things about being a kid. But why should they only be reserved for the young? The young at heart can learn just as much from “having a go” and seeing what happens.</li> <li>Make it a game – There are plenty of un-fun tasks involved in adult life but my shifting your perception, they can be slightly more enjoyable. Try adding an element of playfulness to the situation, You’ll be surprised how much more motivating it can be.</li> <li>Say “No” – Many of us have a lot of trouble saying ‘no’ even when we don’t want to take part in the activity. Kids don’t have the same issue. If they don’t want to do it, they’ll say so. Learning to say ‘no’ ends up giving you more time to say ‘yes’ to the things that matter.</li> <li>Be fearless – Kids, especially young ones, don’t care what other people think about them. At all. This frees them up to explore a whole world of opportunity. Working towards your goals without the fear of judgment can make the process far easier and help your motivation levels remain sky high.</li> </ol> What’s the most important lesson your grandchild has taught you? Tell us about it in the comments below. Related links: <a href="/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/08/is-it-ever-okay-for-children-to-lie/">Is it ever okay for children to lie?</a> <a href="/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/08/how-to-encourage-kids-to-love-cooking/">5 reasons why it’s important to let kids loose in the kitchen</a> <a href="/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/08/expert-advice-for-coping-with-estranged-adult-children/">Expert advice for coping with estranged adult children</a>

Family & Pets

4 motivational tips to help you exercise

You know all about the benefits of exercise yet you still can't bring yourself to do any. You know it could make you happier, encourage your brain to grow stronger, protect against chronic disease and help you maintain a healthy weight, but you still choose to skip the morning sweat session and sleep for an extra hour instead. Everyone needs a little extra motivation to move sometimes. Fortunately, there are science-backed tips that could help get you started. 1. Stop focusing on the unpleasant beginning As with most things in life, taking the first step is the hardest part of developing a regular exercise regime. It's like writing the first line of that annual report. By focusing on the long task ahead we psych ourselves out before we even get started. What we should be doing, is thinking about how great we will feel when the report is done and sitting on the boss' desk. And while reports are inherently unpleasant (in my book), exercise can feel pretty good once you get started. Eric Barker, author of the blog Barking Up the Wrong Tree, quotes a recent study of 279 adults, which found that participants significantly underestimated how much they would enjoy exercising because of a myopic focus on the beginning of exercise. By increasing the expected enjoyment of exercise, the short-sighted tendency could be harnessed and even overcome, resulting in an increased intention to exercise. The results were consistent for both group and individual exercise, as well as moderate to challenging exercises and included workouts ranging from yoga and pilates to aerobic exercise and weight training. 2. Form a strategy Now that you've got your head in the game it's time to think about your game plan. And this could be as simple as talking to a mate about your exercise goals for the week. If you really want to get serious about fitness, you'll need to go beyond mere conversation. It's worth writing down your goals and coming up with strategies to achieve them. Barker quotes Heidi Grant Halvorson's book, Nine Things Successful People Do Differently. "Half the participants were asked to plan where and when they would exercise each week (e.g., "If it is Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, then I will hit the gym for an hour before work"). The results were dramatic: weeks later, 91 per cent of if-then planners were still exercising regularly, compared to only 39 per cent of non-planners." So why does writing things down means you are more likely to do it? Because commitments that are made actively have more staying power than those that are made passively, writes Barker. 3. Make it fun You've heard of the saying "work hard, play hard", but what if those two things could be merged into one and hard work could become enjoyable? Barker uses an interview with Jerry Seinfeld from Lifehacker to illustrate. When asked about how he developed the discipline to write every day, Seinfeld said he made the task into a game. "He told me to get a big wall calendar that has a whole year on one page and hang it on a prominent wall. The next step was to get a big red magic marker. He said for each day that I do my task of writing, I get to put a big red X over that day," said Seinfield. "After a few days you'll have a chain. Just keep at it and the chain will grow longer every day. You'll like seeing that chain, especially when you get a few weeks under your belt. Your only job next is to not break the chain." 4. Listen to your favourite music Listening to your favourite jams is a great way to boost morale when you're working out, even if you've been holding plank for five minutes. How? By taking you to your happy place. Otherwise known as "context dependent memory," Alex Korb, a postdoctoral researcher in neuroscience at UCLA, says "one of the strong effects of music comes from its ability to remind us of previous environments in which we were listening to that music." "Let's say college was the happiest time of your life. If you start listening to the music that you were listening to at that time, it can help you feel more connected to that happier time in your life and makes it more present," says Korb. Pumping out supersets to "Eye of the Tiger" won't just make your workout more enjoyable, it can actually improve your performance too. One study examined 15 participants who listened to preferred and non-preferred music while cycling at high intensity to investigate the effect on their performance. When listening to preferred music the participants were able to exercise for a longer distance, while those listening to non-preferred music tended to perceive more discomfort caused by the exercise. What motivates you to get moving? Let us know in the comments below. Written by Neela Shearer. First appeared on <a href="http://Stuff.co.nz" target="_blank">Stuff.co.nz.</a> Related links: <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/health/body/2016/08/cycling-could-save-you-from-alzheimers-disease/">Cycling could save you from Alzheimer’s disease</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/health/body/2016/07/how-to-reduce-your-cancer-risk/">How to reduce your cancer risk</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/health/body/2016/07/secrets-for-a-healthy-heart-after-60/">5 secrets for a healthy heart after 60</a>

Body

5 ways to stay motivated to exercise during winter

As winter sets in and the days become shorter, motivation levels for exercising during the cooler months start to wane. Who wants to go for a jog when a cup of warm tea, a slice of cake and put on a classic movie? Staying true to your workout routine during winter requires a change of mindset. The first is having a goal or target to aim for. The second is clearly understanding the positive effects your actions will have on your life. Connect with these two forces and you will always be motivated. 1. Set a goal Are you just working out because you feel like you have to? That’s an easy commitment to skip out on. Set yourself a specific goal. It doesn’t have to be something extreme or even anything about your physical appearance. It might be a fun run you want to compete in, a distance you want to run, or the number of times you want to work out consistently a week. 2. Set a deadline Every good goal needs a deadline, so think about yours. Maybe make this next one for the end of winter and then re-evaluate from there. 3. Join a class Sometimes it’s hard to motivate yourself, but if you know you’re supposed to be somewhere (and that people are expecting you), you’re more likely to feel bad for not going. Join a local dance class, cycling group or even a sporting club. 4. Reward yourself It can’t be all work and no play. Develop a reward system for yourself. Perhaps you can’t reach for that slice of cake until you’ve gone for your evening run. No run equals no sugary treat! 5. Buy new workout clothes Are you still wearing your three quarter length tights with a flimsy cardigan, wondering how on earth you will l brave the chill? Invest in good quality work out gear that will keep you warm. Particularly focus on thick, long pants or tights and a bright coloured vest to keep your torso warm. How do you stay motivated to exercise during the winter? Let us know in the comments below. Related links: <a href="/health/body/2016/06/top-tips-for-safe-winter-running/">5 top tips for safe winter running</a> <a href="/health/body/2016/06/expert-tips-for-planning-your-cycling-trip/">5 expert tips for planning your cycling trip</a> <a href="/health/body/2016/06/80-year-old-grandma-is-oldest-female-bodybuilder-in-world/">Is this 80-year-old the world's fittest grandma?</a>

Body

If you need motivation to exercise, look no further than this workout video for cats

Look we get it, it’s hard to muster the motivation to exercise in winter – it’s cold, dreary and… why does the couch look so inviting? But not to worry - Timo, the Ragdoll cat/personal trainer, is here to provide you with tips for your workout. If Timo can do it, so can you! Related links: <a href="/news/news/2015/07/mother-decorates-hearing-aids/">This innovative mother worked magic to make children love their hearing aids</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/what-is-a-grandparent/">When asked to write about their grandparents, these 8-year-olds had the most hilarious responses</a> <a href="/%20http:/www.oversixty.com.au/news/news/2015/07/dog-sells-out-guilty-friend/">Video: dog dobs in her guilty best friend</a>

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Find out how this comedian motivated her grandson to learn cursive handwriting

One of our favourite comedians, Jeanne Robertson, took issue with the fact that her young grandson wasn’t being taught cursive handwriting at school. When he asked her why he needed to know how to read and write in cursive, the quick-witted grandmother had a fantastic answer that ensured her grandson would learn cursive by himself. Related links: <a href="/news/news/2015/07/71-year-old-woman-finishes-161km-race/">A 71-year-old woman completed this 161km marathon in record time</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/worlds-tallest-cow/">Meet the world's tallest cow</a> <a href="/news/news/2015/07/seniors-banned-from-driving-in-victoria/">A record number of seniors have been banned from driving in Victoria</a>

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Therapy dogs are motivating kids who struggle to read

A library in North Carolina, has a fantastic program which allows kids to read to therapy dogs. Every week at The Fletcher Library, a child can schedule an appointment at the library to read to one of the pups from Therapy Dogs International. The initiative provides a safe space where children who have difficulty reading or those with learning disabilities or anxiety disorders can exercise their reading skills.“They bring this calmness and this peace to the children,” Michelle Sheppard, whose eight-year-old daughter, Adriana, participates in the program. “It’s just amazing. Just a short amount of time has such an impact in those moments that they share.”The program began last October when Rachelle Sher offered her therapy dog’s services to the library. The library assistant, Elizabeth Klontz, implemented the program in hopes it would get children who struggle with reading to gain confidence in their abilities.Since the initiative’s started, many of the young readers say they feel comfortable and driven with their reading pal. The Associated Press reported that Adriana missed so much last year due to chronic migraines, that her mom decided to start home-schooling her. The child said she enjoys reading to therapy pup Springer, who's a patient listener.“Being with him, it’s like reading to a friend,” the eight-year-old told the Associated Press. Related links: <a href="/news/news/2015/02/dachshund-helps-save-st-bernard-friend/" target="_blank">A dachshund is a hero after he helped save his St Bernard best friend who was stuck in a ditch for 18 hours</a><a href="/news/news/2015/02/abused-pit-bull-finds-home/" target="_blank">Ill-treated pit bull finds new home and new adorable outfits to protect damaged skin</a><a href="/lifestyle/pets/2014/10/the-joys-of-fostering-pets/" target="_blank">The joys of fostering pets</a>

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