Placeholder Content Image

"I want her parents to know": Fellow Qantas passenger reveals final moments of young woman

<p>The passenger who was seated next to the woman who tragically <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/travel/travel-trouble/young-woman-dies-on-qantas-flight" target="_blank" rel="noopener">died</a> after boarding a Qantas flight has broken his silence on her last moments. </p> <p>Ravinder Singh was seated next to Manpreet Kaur, who passed away shortly after boarding a flight from Melbourne to Delhi on June 20th. </p> <p>The 24-year-old student, who had dreams of becoming a chef, was travelling to see her parents in India for the first time in four years, but did not make it to her destination. </p> <p>Now, Ravinder Singh has shared details on her final moments in the hopes it will bring her grieving parents some comfort. </p> <p>“I was sitting next to her on the Qantas flight from Melbourne to Delhi and was actually the last person to talk to her,” Ravinder Singh exclusively told <a href="https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/incidents/passenger-speaks-after-woman-dies-next-to-him-on-qantas-flight/news-story/24e8396d8eb3a1d35aea4a4291b847ba" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><em>news.com.au</em></a>.</p> <p>“When I boarded the plane, she was already seated in the aisle. I was in the window, so I asked if she could please get up so I could occupy my seat.</p> <p>“I noticed that she began scrolling through photos on her mobile phone and stopped at a photograph of an elderly couple. I asked if they were her parents. She smiled and nodded and kept staring at it.”</p> <p>Mr Singh, who had been in Australia to visit family, said that everything seemed fine and the plane eventually began moving towards the runway, ready for take off.</p> <p>He explained that Ms Kaur had then put her phone down and rested her head on the seat in front, when he realised something was not right.</p> <p>“She was wearing her seatbelt and leaned forward to rest her head on the seat in front. As the plane was preparing for takeoff, I wanted to alert her to sit upright,” he shared.</p> <p>“But the plane jerked and I expected her to wake up. But instead, her head just moved towards me."</p> <p>“I got the attention of a flight attention and told her that this woman does not seem very well. She checked her pulse and after that, the reaction of the cabin crew was very commendable."</p> <p>“They tried their best to revive her. She was then evacuated by medical staff.”</p> <p>The retired army officer said the incident still “haunts him” and he wants her parents to know that she “left the world peacefully”. </p> <p>“The incident has been etched in my memory for life,” he said.</p> <p>“It is very difficult to digest that a young girl with whom you were just interacting with has passed away in front of your eyes."</p> <p>“Her innocent face stills haunts me and I want her parents to know she loved them a lot. She left this world peacefully looking at their photograph."</p> <p>“My heart breaks for her family who would have been looking forward to seeing her after a long time.”</p> <p>It is understood that Ms Kaur had been feeling "unwell" when she arrived at the airport and boarded the plane with no issues, with reports suggesting she died of tuberculosis. </p> <p><em>Image credits: news.com.au</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

"Take it back to her”: Parents' heartbroken plea to thieves who targeted their daughter's grave

<p>When three-year-old Brittany Conway died after swelling a button battery, news of her death made headlines and prompted urgent warnings to parents everywhere. </p> <p>Now, just one month out from the four-year anniversary of Brittany's death, her parents are grieving all over again after their daughter's grave was targeted by callous thieves, who took off with a "precious" keepsake. </p> <p>“She was a vivacious little girl, there was a sparkle in her eye,” Brittany’s mother Lorraine told <a href="https://7news.com.au/news/our-little-princess-parents-anguish-after-precious-item-stolen-from-childs-grave-c-15205766" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><em>7News</em></a>. “She was a very loving, gentle, funny character.”</p> <p>Brittany’s love of tiaras was immortalised when one was placed inside a locked glass-front box attached to her grave.</p> <p>“Brittany loved wearing big bows and pretty dresses, she loved the tiaras and high heels,” Lorraine said.</p> <p>“We just wanted her to know she was our little princess.”</p> <p>Brittany's parents were heartbroken when they discovered that thieves had pried open the lockbox on the grave and stolen the tiara. </p> <p>“I was so angry to think someone had taken something so precious, taken it out of somewhere so sacred,” Lorraine said.</p> <p>The local Gold Coast community has rallied around the family, offering to replace the tiara and even reward money for the beloved item to be returned.</p> <p>Brittany’s parents are still hoping the tiara will be returned, and sharing a public message to the thief that they “did not hate them” for what they had done, but urged them to give the item back.</p> <p>“I’m still angry, I’m hurt, but my main thing now is to get (the tiara) home, and bring it back to Brittany where it belongs,” Lorraine said.</p> <p>“They haven’t thought about how much of an impact it has had on the family."</p> <p>“If you’re watching this, and you’ve taken it, I don’t hate you — just take it back to her.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: 7News</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Teen actress' parents share update after five-storey fall

<p>Mamie Laverock's parents have shared a promising update with fans, after she was left fighting for her life following a five-storey <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/health/caring/teen-actress-on-life-support-after-devastating-mishap" target="_blank" rel="noopener">fall</a>. </p> <p>Her parents Nicole and Rob updated their GoFundMe page for the 19-year-old and said that she was “out of her big surgeries," and confirmed that doctors say she's “doing well.”</p> <p>"Mamie is out of her extensive surgeries and the doctors say she is doing well," they wrote.</p> <p>“It’s impossible for us to be happier,” her parents continued.</p> <p>“Thank you all for your support.”</p> <p>On May 11, Laverock experienced a “medical emergency” and was hospitalised in Winnipeg, Canada before being transferred to another hospital in Vancouver. </p> <p>At the time her parents said her recovery was “unclear", but she was “showing signs of improvement.” </p> <p>More than two weeks later, they shared a harrowing update on their daughter's condition informing fans that she was now on life support after she fell five stories from a balcony walkway while being escorted out of a secure unit in the hospital. </p> <p>Many of her <em>When Calls the Heart </em>co-stars took to social media to promote the crowd-funding page and express their heartbreak. </p> <p>“I love this family, my heart is broken. A devastating time for all who care for Mamie. Please help if you can. They need all the support they can get to make it through this,"  Laverock’s on-screen mother Molly Sullivan wrote on X. </p> <p>"I just donated. If you have the means to do so, I hope you will too. Link in bio,” wrote the show's leading actress Erin Krakow.  </p> <p>The fundraiser has now exceeded the $30,000 CAD target, raising almost $33,000 CAD. </p> <p><em>Image: GoFundMe</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

“We need a donor”: Parents' desperate plea to save young daughter

<p>The heartbroken parents of five-year-old Addison Kemp have made a desperate plea to save their young daughter. </p> <p>Addison suffers from a rare health condition called severe Aplastic anaemia, which means that her body’s bone marrow does not produce enough new blood cells to carry out vital tasks like carry oxygen, control infections or heal after an injury.</p> <p>This means that even a simple nosebleed can be catastrophic for the young girl, as she's forced to spend days in hospital getting blood transfusions to stay alive. </p> <p>Her parents Bianca and Daniel have spoken about her condition in an interview with<em> A Current Affair </em>and explained how without a bone-marrow transplant, the condition could mean death for their young daughter. </p> <p>“She wouldn’t live,” Ms Kemp said.</p> <p>“We need a donor.”</p> <p>The couple first found out about their daughter's condition after she returned home from school with bruises all over her body. </p> <p>Addison was taken to the doctor for a blood test, and they found out about the devastating condition a day later and were told to immediately take her to Queensland Children’s Hospital. </p> <p>“I was gutted, I was devastated. Getting a phone call from the doctor saying you need to rush your little girl to the hospital. That wasn’t a phone call that I wanted,” Mr Kemp said. </p> <p>Addison now has to stay in hospital until she can be matched with a donor. </p> <p>Her little sister Crimson, misses her every day that they are apart. </p> <p>“She gets a bit upset every day that they are not home,” Mr Kemp said. </p> <p>The family said that their bone-marrow did not match up with Addison, and no registered Australian donors had matched up with her either.</p> <p>However, not all hope is lost as any regular Australian could help save a life. </p> <p>Lisa Smith, from bone marrow donation charity Strength to Give, said that the donation process is similar to donating blood which involves a short course of injections before the operation. </p> <p>“The vast majority of time, it is you sitting in a chair, having your blood filtered, while you are watching Netflix," Smith said. </p> <p>Ms Kemp begged Australians to sign up as donors. </p> <p>“I really want to put the message out there that if you can, do,” she said.</p> <p>“You could be saving a life, that’s the biggest thing you could do in the world.”</p> <p><em>Image: A Current Affair</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Madeleine McCann's parents share emotional 21st birthday message

<p>Madeleine McCann's parents have shared a heartbreaking message as they marked their daughter's 21st birthday. </p> <p>Her parents, Kate and Gerry McCann posted the message on the official Find Maddie Campaign Facebook page, with a photo of Maddie in a pink dress and bucket hat - one of the last photos taken of her before she disappeared. </p> <p>"Happy 21st Birthday Madeleine. Still missing. Still missed. Still looking," they wrote. </p> <p>They added the word "hope" on the Facebook photo posted on the page where people regularly donate towards the search efforts to find the missing girl. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C62J1_lgEo3/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C62J1_lgEo3/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Official Find Madeleine Campaign (@officialfindmadeleine)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>It's been 17 years since Madeleine disappeared on May 3 2007, and earlier this month her parents shared another poignant message on the anniversary of her disappearance. </p> <p>"It's 17 years since Madeleine was taken from us," the message posted to social media read. </p> <p>"It's hard to even say that number without shaking our heads in disbelief."</p> <p>"Whilst we are fortunate in many ways and able to live a relatively normal and enjoyable life now, the 'living in limbo' is still very unsettling. And the absence still aches.</p> <p>"Your support continues to encourage us and bolsters our strength to keep going. We know the love and hope for Madeleine and the will to find her, even after so many years, remains, and we are truly thankful for that.</p> <p>"Thank you again for remembering Madeleine and all missing children."</p> <p><em>Image: Instagram</em></p> <p> </p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Parents of murdered brothers break silence in tearful address

<p>As Australia continues to mourn the loss of Callum and Jake Robinson, two adventurous souls whose lives were tragically cut short during a surfing trip in Mexico, the news that broke the hearts of many has brought profound grief not only to their family and friends but also to the broader community who admired their passion for life and the waves.</p> <p>Martin and Debra Robinson, the grieving parents, have now issued a heartbreaking statement through tears from San Diego, California, where they confirmed and shared the devastating account of their sons' untimely deaths. The brothers, Callum aged 33 and Jake aged 30, along with their American friend Jack Carter Rhoad, 30, met their fate in what is believed to be a bungled robbery while camping at San Miguel beach in the Mexican state of Baja California.</p> <p>The details paint a grim picture: the trio's pick-up truck and tents caught the eye of <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/health/caring/arrests-made-over-aussie-surfers-missing-in-mexico" target="_blank" rel="noopener">assailants passing by</a>, leading to a senseless act of violence that claimed their lives. As the Robinsons recounted the harrowing ordeal, the weight of their loss and the injustice of such a senseless tragedy was keenly felt.</p> <p>Days turned into an agonising search when the brothers and their friend vanished on April 27, prompting a desperate hunt that ended in the worst possible outcome. Their bodies, discovered in a well on a nearby cliff, signify the end of a chapter filled with promise and joy, leaving behind a void that can never be filled.</p> <p>In their heartfelt statement, Martin Robinson thanked those who had offered their condolences and said they had been “overwhelmed with the outpouring of emotions and support”. Debra Robinson then spoke through tears, remembering her sons as vibrant individuals who lived life to the fullest. “It is with heavy hearts that we share the news that Callum and Jake have been murdered,” she said. “Our hearts are broken and the world has become a darker place for us.</p> <p>“We also mourn the loss of Carter Rhoad, a close friend.</p> <p>“They were young men enjoying their passion of surfing together.</p> <p>“Now it’s time to bring them home to family and friends, and the ocean waves in Australia. Please: live bigger, shine brighter and love harder in their memory.”</p> <p>The Robinsons' journey to Mexico, culminating in the grim task of identifying their sons' bodies, stands as a testament to a parent's love and the lengths one would go to honour their children. Instagram posts, now <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/health/caring/my-heart-is-shattered-girlfriend-s-tribute-to-partner-killed-in-mexico" target="_blank" rel="noopener">haunting reminders of happier times</a>, capture the essence of their final days – a snapshot frozen in time, a poignant reminder of the fragility of life.</p> <p>Amidst the grief, questions linger, and justice remains elusive. Mexican authorities have apprehended suspects linked to the heinous crime, shedding light on the circumstances surrounding the tragedy. Yet, no amount of closure can fill the void left by the absence of loved ones whose lives were taken too soon.</p> <p>In the wake of tragedy, Debra Robinson's plea resounds louder than ever: live bigger, shine brighter, and love harder – in memory of those we've lost and the moments we hold dear.</p> <p><em>Images: Facebook / News.com.au</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Kochie's warning for every Aussie parent

<p>Australian finance expert David Koch has warned parents to think twice before offering financial assistance to their adult children who are thinking of buying their first home. </p> <p>With many young Australians looking to buy property turning to the “Bank of Mum and Dad” for financial help, Kochie has advised parents to approach this with caution, structured agreements, and clear communication, to reduce the risks and protect both parties involved. </p> <p>“The Bank of Mum and Dad provided $2.7 billion to their adult children to buy property over the past year," the finance expert said on his latest column in <em>The Nightly</em></p> <p>He encouraged a structured approach to navigating the common intergenerational finance practice, and added that financial assistance from parents has become a significant player in the housing market. </p> <p>“If it was an actual bank, it would be somewhere between the fifth and ninth biggest mortgage lender," he said, referring to an estimation by the Productivity Commission. </p> <p>He then warned against the casual approach that is often taken, saying: “We all want to help our kids … But the question is what that help looks like.”</p> <p>“Treat the loan as a business transaction and draw up a formal agreement between each party outlining the terms of the deal, including a set repayment schedule,” he emphasised. </p> <p>Kochie also drew attention to the University of Newcastle’s findings on the increased risk of financial elder abuse associated with parental assistance.</p> <p>“Borrowing from the Bank of Mum and Dad encourages ageist attitudes, which leads to kids financially abusing their parents," he quoted the study. </p> <p>He then differentiated the different forms of financial assistance, explaining the difference between gifts, loans, and guarantees. </p> <p>“If your child is married or in a de facto relationship and it ends, gifts will usually be considered part of the family assets and divided up in court,” he warned. </p> <p>He also offered guidance on parental investments in entrepreneurial ventures, advising parents to “think of your role as that of a regular investor."</p> <p><em>Image: news.com.au </em></p>

Money & Banking

Placeholder Content Image

How to look after your mental health while packing up Mum or Dad’s home

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/erika-penney-1416241">Erika Penney</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-technology-sydney-936">University of Technology Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alice-norton-1516505">Alice Norton</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/avalon-tissue-1515840">Avalon Tissue</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p>So Mum or Dad has died, or moved to aged care, and now you’ve got to pack up their house. It’s a huge job and you’re dreading it.</p> <p>It’s normal to feel grief, loss, guilt, exhaustion or even resentment at being left with this job.</p> <p>So how can you look after your mental health while tackling the task?</p> <h2>It’s OK to feel a lot of feelings</h2> <p>Research has documented how this task can exert an intense <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15267431.2021.1943399">physical and emotional toll</a>.</p> <p>This can be more intense for those who had strained – or even <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/epub/10.1177/0030222819868107">traumatic</a> – relationships with the person whose house they’re packing up.</p> <p>Decisions around distributing or discarding items can, in some families, bring up painful reminders of the past or end up <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1074840711428451">replaying strained dynamics</a>.</p> <p>Family members who were carers for the deceased may feel exhaustion, overwhelm, <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/hec.1512?sid=vendor%3Adatabase">burnout</a> or a sense of injustice they must now continue to be responsible for their loved one’s affairs. Grief can be compounded by the practical challenges of deciding how to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/0148-2963(94)00054-I">store or discard belongings</a>, <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/30000385">arrange the funeral</a>, execute the will, deal with the aged care place or, in some cases, navigate legal disputes.</p> <p>But packing up the house may also be cathartic or helpful. <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15267431.2021.1943399">Research</a> has shown how the task of cleaning out a loved one’s belongings can provide an opportunity for family and friends to talk, share memories, and make sense of what has just happened.</p> <p>It’s also normal to grieve before someone dies. What psychologists call “<a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29206700/">anticipatory</a> grief” can happen to <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1615888/">relatives packing up the house</a> of a parent who has moved to aged care or palliative care.</p> <h2>What to do with all this stuff?</h2> <p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/0148-2963(94)00054-I">Some</a> treat their loved one’s items with sanctity, holding onto as many of their belongings as possible and creating “shrines” in their honour.</p> <p>Others alleviate the weight of grief by clearing out a loved one’s house as soon as possible, giving away, selling or discarding as much as they can.</p> <p>But if you experience a mix of these – enthusiastically getting rid of some stuff, while desperately wanting to hold onto other things – that’s OK too.</p> <p>One <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10253866.2017.1367677">study</a> identified a process punctuated by four key periods:</p> <ol> <li> <p>numbness and overwhelm at the task of packing the house</p> </li> <li> <p>yearning to maintain a link to the loved through their belongings</p> </li> <li> <p>working through grief, anger and guilt regarding the loved one and the task of managing their belongings, and</p> </li> <li> <p>healing and making sense of the relationship with the deceased and their belongings.</p> </li> </ol> <p>However, it is important to note everyone’s approach is different and there is no “right” way to do the clean out, or “right” way to feel.</p> <h2>Caring for your mental health during the clean out</h2> <p>To care for your mental health during these difficult times, you might try to:</p> <ul> <li> <p>make space for your feelings, whether it’s sadness, loss, resentment, anger, relief or all the above. There is no right or wrong way to feel. <a href="https://guilfordjournals.com/doi/abs/10.1521/jscp.2011.30.2.163">Accepting</a> your emotions is healthier than suppressing them</p> </li> <li> <p>share the load. <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1046/j.1365-2648.1999.01220.x">Research</a> has shown practical support from close friends and family can help a lot with grief. Accept help with packing, planning, dealing with removalists, selling or donating items and cleaning. Don’t be afraid to reduce your mental load by delegating tasks to friends, who are likely wondering how they can help</p> </li> <li> <p>take a systematic approach. Break tasks into their smallest component. For example, aim to clean out a drawer instead of an entire bedroom. This can help the mental and physical task feel more manageable</p> </li> <li> <p>reflect on what’s meaningful to you. Some belongings will have <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/0148-2963(94)00054-I">meaning</a>, while others will not. What was valuable to the deceased may not be valuable to you. Things they probably saw as pretty worthless (a handwritten shopping list, an old sewing kit) may be very meaningful to you. Ask yourself whether retaining a small number of meaningful possessions would allow you to maintain a connection with your loved one, or if clearing out the space and discarding the items is what you need</p> </li> <li> <p>share your story. When you feel ready, share your “<a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15267431.2021.1943399">cleaning out the closet</a>” story with trusted friends and family. Storytelling allows the deceased to live on in memory. <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1046/j.1365-2648.1999.01220.x">Research</a> also suggests we cope better with bereavement when friends and relatives make time to hear our feelings</p> </li> <li> <p>remember that professional help is available. Just as a solicitor can help with legal disputes, a mental health professional can help you process your feelings.</p> </li> </ul> <p>The home of your loved one is not merely a place where they lived, but a space filled with meaning and stories.</p> <p>Packing up the house of a loved one can be incredibly daunting and challenging, but it can also be an important part of your grieving process.</p> <p><em>If this article has raised issues for you, or if you’re concerned about someone you know, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.</em><!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223956/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/erika-penney-1416241">E<em>rika Penney</em></a><em>, Lecturer in Clinical Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-technology-sydney-936">University of Technology Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alice-norton-1516505">Alice Norton</a>, Lecturer in Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/avalon-tissue-1515840">Avalon Tissue</a>, Associate Lecturer in Clinical Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-to-look-after-your-mental-health-while-packing-up-mum-or-dads-home-223956">original article</a>.</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Hall of Fame fighter hospitalised after saving elderly parents from fire

<p>In the heart of Ohio, a story of heroism and sacrifice has emerged from the flames of a devastating house fire.</p> <p>Mark Coleman, a revered figure in the world of mixed martial arts (MMA) and the UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship), found himself in the midst of a harrowing ordeal, where his actions transcended the octagon to demonstrate unparalleled bravery and love for family.</p> <p>On a fateful Tuesday morning, as the dawn painted the sky over Fremont, Ohio, tragedy struck the Coleman household. Details of the fire initially emerged through local news outlets, shrouded in anonymity. However, it wasn't long before the truth surfaced – it was Mark Coleman, the UFC legend, who had selflessly rushed into the inferno to rescue his elderly parents from imminent danger.</p> <p>Reports indicated that Coleman, aged 59, wasted no time in the face of adversity. With unwavering determination, he courageously carried both of his parents, Dan and Connie Foos Coleman, to safety, braving the engulfing flames that threatened to consume their home. Yet, his valour knew no bounds as he plunged back into the fiery abyss, driven by an instinctive urge to save another beloved member of the family – their loyal dog, Hammer.</p> <p>Tragically, despite his desperate efforts, the canine companion did not survive the blaze. Coleman's daughter, Kenzie, revealed on social media that Hammer's persistent barking had roused her father from slumber, ultimately saving his life. This heartbreaking loss added another layer of sorrow to an already traumatic event.</p> <p>As news of Coleman's heroic act spread, an outpouring of support and prayers flooded social media platforms. His second daughter Morgan, in an emotional Instagram post, recounted her father's selfless deeds and pleaded for continued prayers during this trying time. To the Coleman family, Mark wasn't just a UFC pioneer; he was a beacon of strength and resilience, a cherished father and a beloved friend.</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C4bQHaopteq/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C4bQHaopteq/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Morgan Coleman (@mocoleman18)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Mark Coleman's legacy in the world of MMA is undeniable. Dubbed "The Godfather of Ground-and-Pound", he etched his name in the annals of UFC history as the organisation's inaugural heavyweight champion in 1997. His contributions to the sport earned him a well-deserved place in the UFC Hall of Fame in 2008, solidifying his status as a true icon.</p> <p>However, beyond the glitz and glory of the octagon, Coleman's journey has been marked by personal struggles and triumphs. In 2020, he battled a heart attack, a testament to his resilience in the face of adversity. A year later, he confronted his demons, seeking rehabilitation for alcoholism, and emerged stronger, embracing a healthier lifestyle.</p> <p>Author Jonathan Snowden, who shared a close bond with Coleman and was poised to document his remarkable life story, offered a glimpse into the aftermath of the fire. Through poignant images capturing the devastation, Snowden provided a raw and unfiltered portrayal of the ordeal. </p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">This is what's left of the house Mark Coleman and his family were in last night. </p> <p>Mark's dog Hammer woke him up to a house in flames. He saved both his parents and is fighting for his life. <a href="https://t.co/hicYhv7SDm">pic.twitter.com/hicYhv7SDm</a></p> <p>— Jonathan Snowden (@JESnowden) <a href="https://twitter.com/JESnowden/status/1767637195555299781?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 12, 2024</a></p></blockquote> <p><em>Images: Instagram / Twitter (X)</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

How to navigate a parent’s cancer diagnosis – like Princes William and Harry will now have to do

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lydia-harkin-1510450">Lydia Harkin</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/nottingham-trent-university-1338">Nottingham Trent University</a></em></p> <p>King Charles’ <a href="https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68209998">cancer diagnosis</a> means the royal family has joined the approximately 3 million families in the UK affected by the disease. His family has already gathered around in support. William, Prince of Wales, has taken over some public duties for his father. And younger son Harry, who lives in California, flew to the UK to visit after the diagnosis was announced.</p> <p>If you, like William and Harry, are navigating a parent’s diagnosis, you are not alone. Around 400,000 people are <a href="https://www.macmillan.org.uk/about-us/what-we-do/research/cancer-statistics-fact-sheet">diagnosed</a> each year. This can be a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/pon.4287">frightening</a> and difficult time for families, and can change family dynamics.</p> <p>Adult children may find themselves offering emotional and practical support for a parent in a way that has not been required before, through managing medications and symptoms, travel to medical appointments, help with meal preparation and financial support.</p> <p>It can be rewarding to support a loved one and an important way to actively work together, but it can also be stressful. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/pon.4056">Studies have found</a> that family caregivers are generally more anxious and more likely to hide their emotional distress when compared with their family member with cancer.</p> <h2>Being a supportive family, even in conflict</h2> <p>Family support can act as a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.2333">“social cure”</a> against the stress of a life-changing illness. The social cure theory proposes that being a part of a social group (or multiple groups) has benefits for our health and wellbeing. Social groups, particularly those with whom we strongly identify, like families, provide support and help us to combat times of stress.</p> <p>The key psychological component here is that people feel they belong to and identify with their groups. While undergoing cancer treatment, someone may not be able to participate in their usual social groups – through work or hobbies – as much as they used to. These groups may then become incompatible with a person’s new identity as a cancer survivor.</p> <p>Of course, not all families work together harmoniously, and may be in conflict through divorce, separation or estrangement. Social psychologists have <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/bjso.12155">found that</a> “incompatible” social groups can lead to poorer mental health.</p> <p>Separated families can still come together and be a helpful social group, but they must offer the kind of support that their loved one needs. To figure this out, it is important to think about the person’s <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.2333">identity</a> within the family.</p> <p>For example, a father may view his identity as an advisor, but a cancer diagnosis requires him to be cared for and to seek advice. He may feel a sense of loss for his typical family role, a loss of meaning and of control.</p> <p>However, if his family communicates openly about the difficulties they are all facing, the father may be able to continue to advise his family, in addition to receiving their advice. This can help to maintain his sense of identity as an advisor within his family, while navigating a new status as a cancer survivor.</p> <h2>Communication and support networks</h2> <p>Cancer throws patients and their loved ones into a complex health system, often for the first time, where medical decisions and terminology become important every day. Understanding <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ejon.2014.03.012">the “language of cancer”</a> can help families feel more in control after a diagnosis.</p> <p>Equally important is communication within a family. Talking about the cancer, rather than treating it as a taboo topic, can improve <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ejon.2020.101841">mental health for both patients and their families</a>. It may also be an opportunity to empower patients and their loved ones to seek outside support, such as counselling.</p> <p>Families spread across geographical distances (like the royal family) can offer emotional support through regular phone calls or online tools. During the pandemic, <a href="https://doi.org/10.2196/42172">I developed</a> and trialled an app to help older adults combat loneliness. The app allowed them to see a digital map of their social groups, including family members.</p> <p>Your family member with cancer may feel like a burden. This is a common fear in older adulthood generally. But reminding them of how many people are in their lives – and how many people they support – can combat this feeling.</p> <p>Social media is one way to get more involved in these reciprocal support networks. In my work, families affected by cancer have reported using online communities to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s11764-017-0616-1">better understand what their family is going through</a>. Private social media groups <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/2055207619898993">dedicated to illness</a> can be helpful spaces to meet other patients and families, share experiences and normalise cancer.</p> <p>Cancer communities exist on <a href="https://doi.org/10.4103%2Fijpvm.IJPVM_36_19">Instagram</a>, on <a href="https://doi.org/10.1007/s00345-018-2254-2">YouTube and X/Twitter</a> and through registered cancer charities like <a href="https://www.macmillan.org.uk/">Macmillan Cancer Support</a>. These online resources all provide a way to build a network following a cancer diagnosis.</p> <p>Just as group identification is important within families, having more groups to connect to can act as a buffer during stressful times and help you all cope with your new reality.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223214/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lydia-harkin-1510450"><em>Lydia Harkin</em></a><em>, Principal Lecturer in Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/nottingham-trent-university-1338">Nottingham Trent University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-to-navigate-a-parents-cancer-diagnosis-like-princes-william-and-harry-will-now-have-to-do-223214">original article</a>.</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Dad cops furious note from "egotistical Karen" for parking in parent's bay

<p>A Perth dad has been left hurt after he was targeted by an "egotistical Karen" for parking in a parent's bay, while his wife was inside a shopping centre changing their seven-month-old baby. </p> <p>"Don't park here again, you selfish prick!" the note read. </p> <p>His wife took to Facebook on behalf of her hurt husband to question why someone would go out of their way to criticise him for parking in a space designated for parents. </p> <p>"My husband was putting a baby gate in the boot while I was in the forum changing our seven-month-old baby," she defended her partner, who parked at the Mandurah Forum. </p> <p>"He came back into the forum looking for me [and] when we returned, someone had put this note on our windscreen.</p> <p>"How about next time you be sure before insulting an innocent husband and father, you hero."</p> <p>The woman said that the note left her husband "hurt and almost feeling guilty" and she argued that he had every right to be there as a parent. </p> <p>Her post attracted over 300 interactions with many agreeing with the mum, and saying that the "Karen" should've gotten their facts straight before taking action. </p> <p>"There is no law for who can park in parents with prams spaces they are just convenience but anyone can park there and use,"  one man wrote. </p> <p>A few others shared the same sentiment and said that "it's not illegal to park in those bays" regardless of whether or not you have a baby. </p> <p>Some parents even shared their own experiences and why it is important to not judge someone based on looks alone. </p> <p>"This has happened to me also. I had a baby and a toddler and my husband took them inside the Mandurah forum while I unloaded our car," the person began. </p> <p>"A couple with a baby parked next to me and the man kept yelling at me that it was only for parents with prams, even though I told him I had young kids and a pram. But he didn't believe me and yelled loudly to move my car."</p> <p>One mum added that she doesn't see the need for parents with prams spaces altogether.</p> <p>"As a mum of just a five-year-old, I personally don’t see the need for parent spaces. They are not any bigger, just more convenient. Kids need exercise and prams have wheels, not hard to walk," she wrote. </p> <p>"I personally think they should be seniors bays instead, they are less mobile and struggle to walk long distances. Give them the spots."</p> <p><em>Images: Facebook</em></p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

Parents busted for making their healthy child use a wheelchair to claim benefits

<p>A cruel mother and father have been jailed for over six years for forcing their healthy child to use a wheelchair in order to claim benefit payments. </p> <p>In 2012, Louise Law and her ex-husband Martin forced their then seven-year-old daughter into the wheelchair, as a ploy to gain a mobility car and disability allowance payments despite their being nothing wrong with her. </p> <p>The parents carried on with the scam for four years while they "fabricated illnesses and exaggerated symptoms" to teachers and NHS workers, all while raking in the extensive payments. </p> <p>The crown court in East Yorkshire, England, heard that the child suffered "gratuitous degradation" at being forced to use the wheelchair, as they were bullied at school and deprived of an ordinary childhood. </p> <p>In court, Louise Law admitted an offence of child cruelty, however she changed her plea on the day of a scheduled trial and was jailed for six years and nine months.</p> <p>Martin Law, now split from his wife, is now a long-term resident of a care home and was ruled unfit to enter a plea - although a jury convicted him of child cruelty, and was made subject of a guardianship order.</p> <p>Passing sentence, Judge Kate Rayfield told Mrs Law, "She missed out on so much of her childhood because of what you put her through."</p> <p>"Despite all of her tests revealing nothing wrong, you continued to subject her to appointments and investigations. You did the talking yourselves, telling the doctors lies."</p> <p>"This was a scam... You were telling her to report symptoms that she never said that she had."</p> <p>When the child reached the age of 18 in 2022, she was interviewed by police as she said the faux medical treatment from her parents began when she was six years old. </p> <p>A few initial medical appointments progressed to around 30 hospital appointments, including overnight stays.</p> <p>Prosecutor Louise Reevell told the court, "Her parents made her think that she could not walk properly. She would go to school in a wheelchair but she didn't really need it."</p> <p>Despite medical professionals proving that the child did not need the extensive medical treatment, her parents still claimed that the illnesses and symptoms of their daughter were genuine.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

How do I handle it if my parent is refusing aged care? 4 things to consider

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lee-fay-low-98311">Lee-Fay Low</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p>It’s a shock when we realise our parents aren’t managing well at home.</p> <p>Perhaps the house and garden are looking more chaotic, and Mum or Dad are relying more on snacks than nutritious meals. Maybe their grooming or hygiene has declined markedly, they are socially isolated or not doing the things they used to enjoy. They may be losing weight, have had a fall, aren’t managing their medications correctly, and are at risk of getting scammed.</p> <p>You’re worried and you want them to be safe and healthy. You’ve tried to talk to them about aged care but been met with swift refusal and an indignant declaration “I don’t need help – everything is fine!” Now what?</p> <p>Here are four things to consider.</p> <h2>1. Start with more help at home</h2> <p>Getting help and support at home can help keep Mum or Dad well and comfortable without them needing to move.</p> <p>Consider drawing up a roster of family and friends visiting to help with shopping, cleaning and outings. You can also use home aged care services – or a combination of both.</p> <p>Government subsidised home care services provide from one to 13 hours of care a week. You can get more help if you are a veteran or are able to pay privately. You can take advantage of things like rehabilitation, fall risk-reduction programs, personal alarms, stove automatic switch-offs and other technology aimed at increasing safety.</p> <p>Call <a href="https://www.myagedcare.gov.au/">My Aged Care</a> to discuss your options.</p> <h2>2. Be prepared for multiple conversations</h2> <p>Getting Mum or Dad to accept paid help can be tricky. Many families often have multiple conversations around aged care before a decision is made.</p> <p>Ideally, the older person feels supported rather than attacked during these conversations.</p> <p>Some families have a meeting, so everyone is coming together to help. In other families, certain family members or friends might be better placed to have these conversations – perhaps the daughter with the health background, or the auntie or GP who Mum trusts more to provide good advice.</p> <p>Mum or Dad’s main emotional support person should try to maintain their relationship. It’s OK to get someone else (like the GP, the hospital or an adult child) to play “bad cop”, while a different person (such as the older person’s spouse, or a different adult child) plays “good cop”.</p> <h2>3. Understand the options when help at home isn’t enough</h2> <p>If you have maximised home support and it’s not enough, or if the hospital won’t discharge Mum or Dad without extensive supports, then you may be <a href="https://academic.oup.com/gerontologist/article/60/8/1504/5863160">considering a nursing home</a> (also known as residential aged care in Australia).</p> <p>Every person has a legal right to <a href="https://humanrights.gov.au/our-work/9-your-right-choose-where-you-live">choose where we live</a> (unless they have lost capacity to make that decision).</p> <p>This means families can’t put Mum or Dad into residential aged care against their will. Every person also has the right to choose to take risks. People can choose to continue to live at home, even if it means they might not get help immediately if they fall, or eat poorly. We should respect Mum or Dad’s decisions, even if we disagree with them. Researchers call this “dignity of risk”.</p> <p>It’s important to understand Mum or Dad’s point of view. Listen to them. Try to figure out what they are feeling, and what they are worried might happen (which might not be rational).</p> <p>Try to understand what’s really important to their quality of life. Is it the dog, having privacy in their safe space, seeing grandchildren and friends, or something else?</p> <p>Older people are often understandably concerned about losing independence, losing control, and having strangers in their personal space.</p> <p>Sometimes families prioritise physical health over psychological wellbeing. But we need to consider both when considering nursing home admission.</p> <p><a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9826495/">Research</a> suggests going into a nursing home temporarily increases loneliness, risk of depression and anxiety, and sense of losing control.</p> <p>Mum and Dad should be involved in the decision-making process about where they live, and when they might move.</p> <p>Some families start looking “just in case” as it often takes some time to <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/everyday/questions-to-ask-when-choosing-an-aged-care-home-for-a-loved-one/10302590">find the right nursing home</a> and there can be a wait.</p> <p>After you have your top two or three choices, take Mum or Dad to visit them. If this is not possible, take pictures of the rooms, the public areas in the nursing home, the menu and the activities schedule.</p> <p>We should give Mum or Dad information about their options and risks so they can make informed (and hopefully better) decisions.</p> <p>For instance, if they visit a nursing home and the manager says they can go on outings whenever they want, this might dispel a belief they are “locked up”.</p> <p>Having one or two weeks “respite” in a home may let them try it out before making the big decision about staying permanently. And if they find the place unacceptable, they can try another nursing home instead.</p> <h2>4. Understand the options if a parent has lost capacity to make decisions</h2> <p>If Mum or Dad have lost capacity to choose where they live, family may be able to make that decision in their best interests.</p> <p>If it’s not clear whether a person has capacity to make a particular decision, a medical practitioner can assess for that capacity.</p> <p>Mum or Dad may have appointed an <a href="https://www.tag.nsw.gov.au/wills/appoint-enduring-guardian/what-enduring-guardian">enduring guardian</a> to make decisions about their health and lifestyle decisions when they are not able to.</p> <p>An enduring guardian can make the decision that the person should live in residential aged care, if the person no longer has the capacity to make that decision themselves.</p> <p>If Mum or Dad didn’t appoint an enduring guardian, and have lost capacity, then a court or tribunal can <a href="https://www.tag.nsw.gov.au/guardianship/information-about-guardianship">appoint</a> that person a private guardian (usually a family member, close friend or unpaid carer).</p> <p>If no such person is available to act as private guardian, a public official may be appointed as public guardian.</p> <h2>Deal with your own feelings</h2> <p>Families often feel <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12144-023-04538-9">guilt and grief</a> during the decision-making and transition process.</p> <p>Families need to act in the best interest of Mum or Dad, but also balance other caring responsibilities, financial priorities and their own wellbeing.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/221210/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lee-fay-low-98311"><em>Lee-Fay Low</em></a><em>, Professor in Ageing and Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-do-i-handle-it-if-my-parent-is-refusing-aged-care-4-things-to-consider-221210">original article</a>.</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Heartbroken parents of slain Melbourne doctor break silence

<p>Dr Ash Gordon's heartbroken parents have spoken out about the moment they found out their son had died. </p> <p>The Melbourne GP was allegedly killed after <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/news/news/major-update-in-tragic-death-of-young-melbourne-doctor" target="_blank" rel="noopener">confronting two teenage</a> boys who had allegedly broken into his home in Doncaster in the early hours on Saturday, January 13.</p> <p>Dr Gordon’s grieving mother Catherine, recalled the moment she was woken by the phone call no parent wants to receive. </p> <p>“He said that Ashley had gone. And I said gone where? He’s gone. He’s no longer with us,” Mrs Gordon told <em>A Current Affair </em>about the moment her son's housemate delivered the devastating news. </p> <p>“I said, ‘Don’t lie, you’re joking.‘ And I hung up on him."</p> <p>Holding back tears, Mrs Gordon also shared the denial she went through as she received the call from a detective. </p> <p>"Then the detective rang and I told him that I didn’t believe him, and he said 'how can I get you to believe?', I said 'until there is a police person in uniform in front of me, it's not happening'"</p> <p>"Well you don't want to believe do you?" <em>A Current Affair </em>host Ally Langdon replied, and both parents shook their heads. </p> <p>“We saw the police car coming up, and I just prayed to God they’d just keep going. I didn’t want them to turn into the driveway, but unfortunately, it happened.”</p> <p>Ally Langdon who was brought to tears during the interview added: “It’s a cruel contrast isn’t it? That Ash has dedicated his life to saving lives, yet his was taken in this horrible way." </p> <p>The 33-year-old doctor was found by police less than a kilometre from his home, but unfortunately he died at the scene. </p> <p>In the days following the incident, two 16-year-old boys with Dr Gordon’s murder as well as aggravated burglary and theft.</p> <p>Dr Gordon's family have since held a <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/health/caring/i-ll-see-you-again-one-day-sister-of-slain-doctor-s-emotional-tribute" target="_blank" rel="noopener">memorial service</a> for him to honour the slain doctor. </p> <p><em>Image: A Current Affair</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Flight cancelled after parents demand free upgrade for their child

<p dir="ltr">A flight was delayed for hours before being ultimately cancelled after two parents demanded that their child was upgraded to first class for free. </p> <p dir="ltr">A plane in China was grounded for three hours after the parents caused a ruckus with the cabin crew, and were eventually kicked off the aircraft. </p> <p dir="ltr">According to a fellow passenger, the argument kicked off when an unsupervised child began to sob uncontrollably after boarding a flight from Chengdu to Beijing. </p> <p dir="ltr">As it turned out, the inconsolable toddler’s parents were seated in first class but had only bought their child an economy ticket.</p> <p dir="ltr">It was then that the angry dad confronted the staff, demanding that his son be moved to first class at no extra cost.</p> <p dir="ltr">According to the <em>South China Morning Post</em>, the irate dad explained that because he had already paid for two first class tickets, his child’s upgrade should be free. </p> <p dir="ltr">In the clip shot by a fellow passenger, the outraged dad began berating a group of passengers, crew members, and security guards as they repeatedly explained why his child isn’t entitled to an upgrade.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Stop swearing at me,” fumed the father. “You have no right to do that.”</p> <p dir="ltr">When a security guard attempts to de-escalate the situation, the parent lays into him, shouting: “What gives you the right to order me about?”</p> <p dir="ltr">This prompts a woman to retort: “You’ve wasted too much of our time and we won’t tolerate it any longer.”</p> <p dir="ltr">After three hours of back and forth, the couple were eventually kicked off the plane, while the flight was cancelled. </p> <p dir="ltr">The entitled passenger has since been rinsed on social media with one commenter fuming, “This man is so selfish.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Others suggested solutions for the father that didn’t involve the airline giving the man an extra first-class seat.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He can switch seats,” advised one person. “Let him sit in economy class, and have the mum take care of the child in the first-class cabin.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Some on social media were quick to chastise the airline for their handling of the situation, with one person writing, “Keeping the quarrel going for hours? The problem-solving skills of the crew are poor.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Twitter</em><span id="docs-internal-guid-dd8af609-7fff-7da2-9017-179b6317cd24"></span></p>

Travel Trouble

Placeholder Content Image

"It's always a tough day": What has changed in the 20 years since Daniel Morcombe's death

<p>Daniel Morcombe's parents have reflected on the day their son was kidnapped and murdered, on the 20th anniversary of his disappearance. </p> <p>Bruce Morcombe appeared on <em>Sunrise</em> on Thursday morning, sharing how the date is always a painful one to live through. </p> <p>Daniel was 13-years-old old when he was kidnapped from a bus stop on Queensland's Sunshine Coast on December 7th 2003, with Peter Cowan later being convinced for his murder in 2014. </p> <p>“It’s always a tough day but what we think about is Daniel’s brothers, our other two sons, and our grandkids,” he said.</p> <p>“They lost a brother, a twin brother. They will be hurting equally the same.”</p> <p>Since Daniel disappeared, the Morcombes have dedicated their lives to keeping other children safe, establishing the Daniel Morcombe Foundation shortly after his murder. </p> <p>As well as raising awareness on child safety, the couple offer practical advice for families, such as creating a “family password” with your kids as a way to keep them safe.</p> <p><em>Sunrise</em> host Monique Wright became emotional while speaking to the Morcombes, saying, “Bruce and Denise Morcombe, they have just changed so many lives through their tireless work.”</p> <p>“It’s irrefutable that they have stopped so much child abuse over the years, just extraordinary,” she added.</p> <p>Bruce added that while it is a sad day as they remember their son, it is important to remind people of his legacy while keeping others safe.</p> <p>“Remember this was a young boy of 13, 12 days short of turning 14. He never made it to 14,” he said.</p> <p>“It happened to Daniel, it can happen to you. Daniel was an innocent kid, like anybody else.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Sunrise</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Aussie couple touched by neighbours kind response to crying baby

<p>A Western Australia mum has shared the incredibly touching response her neighbour gave in response to her baby's crying. </p> <p>Amy Mark took to Facebook to share a photo of the note and a bundle of baby supplies that was left by her neighbour at her front door on Wednesday. </p> <p>"Hey, we are your neighbours from behind you," the note read.</p> <p>"We have heard your little bub crying a few times and thought we would drop off some nappies and wipes as we know how tough the early days are!</p> <p>"We hope this brightens your day," the note concluded. </p> <p>Amy captioned the photo: "Our neighbours left this note at our front door along with some nappies and wipes. Thank you for your kindness and being patient with the noise of a crying newborn." </p> <p>The mum told <em>Daily Mail Australia </em>that their newborn is often restless and night and struggles to fall asleep until 10pm. </p> <p>"We were worried about keeping the neighbours awake but it’s warming to know that some people understand the nighttime struggle," she told the publication. </p> <p>"A lot of parents have it harder than we do so we are grateful for the kind gesture and plan to pay it forward."</p> <p>Thousands of Aussies took to the comments to applaud the kind neighbours and also offered their sympathy for the new parents. </p> <p>"More people should be neighbours like this," one wrote. </p> <p>"What wonderful neighbours to have. That brought tears to my eyes," another commented. </p> <p>"Gifts and understanding, what more can you ask for?" a third added. </p> <p>A few other mum's took to the comments to share their experiences with thoughtful neighbours. </p> <p>One mum wrote: "I had a lovely neighbour who used to come hold and cuddle my twins while we chatted and it helped me get a few things done." </p> <p><em>Image: Facebook</em></p> <p> </p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Parents slapped with hefty fee over badly behaved children

<p dir="ltr">Two parents have been slapped with a hefty fine tacked onto their restaurant bill after their children caused a ruckus during dinner. </p> <p dir="ltr">Kyle and Lyndsey Landmann were dining at a restaurant in Georgia, USA, when they were given a $50 fine for their allegedly badly behaved kids. </p> <p dir="ltr">Two weeks after the incident, Kyle took to Google to leave a negative review for the eatery to say he was “disappointed by the experience”. </p> <p dir="ltr">“The owner came out and told me he was adding $50 to my bill because of my children’s behaviour,” he wrote. </p> <p dir="ltr">“My kids watched a tablet until the food arrived, ate their food and my wife took them outside while I waited and paid the bill.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Lyndsey went on to tell <em>Today</em> that her kids were well behaved, although they were joined by other families, with 11 children in total at the table. </p> <p dir="ltr">“The kids were sitting at one end of the table and they were being so good,” Landmann said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“'I even commented halfway through the meal, ‘I can’t believe how well-behaved they are’.”</p> <p dir="ltr">After dinner, restaurant owner Tim Richter approached the table and told the party about the additional charge on the menu, which reads, “Adult surcharge: For adults unable to parent.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“Be Respectful to staff, property, and self. No Respect, No Service.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Landmann said she was expecting a compliment for the well behaved kids, but Richter said there would be $50 added to each bill at their table. </p> <p dir="ltr">When Landmann then asked for an explanation, she claimed Richter told her they were being “too loud”.</p> <p dir="ltr">He was angry that the kids were “running around outside” by the water after dinner, even though they were chaperoned by adults, she clarified.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I was like, ‘They were quiet the whole time’. He got in our faces and told us that we belonged at Burger King and not at his restaurant. We asked to speak to the owner and he said he was the owner,” Landmann explained.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I looked around the restaurant and everybody was frozen watching this show he was putting on. He was yelling.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The 61-year-old restaurant owner said that he implemented the rule during the pandemic, but never actually charged the couple, saying, “We want parents to be parents.”</p> <p dir="ltr">However, several other Google reviews blasted the quality of the service and the owner's attitude, including one that warns diners with children to steer clear.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Facebook</em></p>

Money & Banking

Placeholder Content Image

Location, Location, Location host loses both parents in tragic accident

<p>In heart-wrenching news has shaken the world of television, beloved <em>Location, Location, Location </em>host Phil Spencer has spoken out about the devastating loss of his parents in a tragic accident on their family farm.</p> <p>Spencer paid a somber tribute to his father Richard, known affectionately as David, aged 89, and his mother Anne, 82, who were both tragically lost.</p> <p>In a poignant display of love, Phil, now 53, shared an image of the couple and wrote: "Very sadly both of my amazing parents died on Friday.</p> <p>"As a family we are all trying to hold onto the fact Mum and Dad went together and that neither will ever have to mourn the loss of the other one. Which is a blessing in itself."</p> <p>Spencer went on to disclose the harrowing details surrounding the accident, giving a glimpse into the tragic events that unfolded on that fateful day: "The car, going very slowly, toppled over a bridge on the farm drive, upside down into the river. There were no physical injuries and I very much doubt they would have even fought it - they would have held hands under the water and quietly slipped away.</p> <p>Spencer acknowledged the heroic efforts of his brother, who valiantly attempted to save their parents in the aftermath of the crash.</p> <p>"As many farmers do - my brother had a penknife and so was able to cut the seat belts - he pulled them out of the river but they never regained consciousness.</p> <p>"Although desperately sad and shocked beyond all belief - all family are clear that if there can ever be such a thing as having a 'good end' - this was it."</p> <p><span style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;">Spencer also recalled a poignant conversation he had with his mother, a conversation now weighed down by the melancholy of hindsight: "Although they were both on extremely good form in the days before (hence the sudden idea to go out to lunch), Mums Parkinson's and Dads Dementia had been worsening and the long term future was set to be a challenge.</span></p> <p>"So much so that Mum said to me only a week ago that she had resigned to thinking 'now it looks like we will probably go together'. And so they did."</p> <p>As he concluded his heartfelt statement, Spencer mused on the overwhelming nature of their passing, acknowledging the future comfort that might come from the knowledge that they departed from a place they held dear.</p> <p>"It feels horrendous right now, but after almost 60 years of marriage - to die together on the farm they so loved will, I know, be a comfort in the future.</p> <p>"Mum Dad are together which is precisely where they would have wanted to be. ❤️"</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CwKpOWJr4Wj/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CwKpOWJr4Wj/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Phil Spencer (@philspencertv)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Kirstie Allsopp, Phil's co-host on <em>Location, Location, Location</em>, a dear friend, was among the first to respond, her words echoing the collective grief felt by many: "Such a brave and loving statement and so typical of you & your lovely family. So many people have you all in their thoughts and prayers. xxx"</p> <p>Tragically, David and Anne were en route to a local pub for lunch when their car veered off the access road, plunging into a shallow river on their estate.</p> <p>Emergency services, fire brigade and police attended the scene, and an air ambulance landing nearby at the Littlebourne farm in Kent.</p> <p>Despite efforts to save them, Richard succumbed at the hospital, with Anne following suit shortly thereafter.</p> <p>Kirstie reflected: “I’ve spoken to Phil and it’s tragic for the Spencer family, but his parents were together and that’s something that is a great source of solace to them all.</p> <p>“The family is very loving and close. There are four children, Phil, Robert, Caryn and Helen, and they had eight grandchildren.</p> <p>“This is awful for all of the family, but they were together at the end and they were lovely people."</p> <p><em>Images: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

"What were their parents thinking?!" Teacher releases list of hilarious student names

<p>In a world where coming up with a standard name seems about as trendy as using a landline phone, parents are unleashing their inner creativity by bestowing upon their offspring names that sound like they were created during a fever dream.</p> <p>We are clearly smack bang in the middle of the era of "Name your child after a random object you find in the pantry" – and teachers are the unsung heroes bravely navigating the choppy waters of these monikers. Specifically, how to spell (and pronounce) them properly.</p> <p>Now, let's not pretend this phenomenon is fresh off the naming press. Celebrities have been gifting their kids with names that could pass as WiFi passwords for donks. It was just a matter of time before the masses caught onto the fad like a catchy tune you can't unhear. But spare a thought for those noble educators who are more baffled than a cat watching a magic trick when confronted with these labels during roll call.</p> <p>Enter one valiant and anonymous teacher, armed with a class register that reads like a cryptic crossword puzzle. She unveiled her list of quirky names on the modern-day town square, aka Facebook, explaining that she merely gave the enrolment list a "blink and you'll miss it" glance. Because let's face it, no one has time to decode this kindergarten code on a Tuesday morning.</p> <p>So, brace yourself, because the highlights of this peculiar parade include names like Jaxen (apparently the 'x' gives it that extra pizzazz) and Aliyah, which sounds like a harmonious collision of Aladdin and Elijah. But the true gems are still to come.</p> <p>Hold onto your hats, for there's a Syakyra in the house! It's pronounced like "Shakira", because why make life easy when you can transform spelling into an extreme sport? Also on the roster of eccentricities are Rhydah, Presillar, Christisarah (which sounds like someone sneezed while naming their child), Anjewel'Lea (because apostrophes are the new vowels), and Biar Biar – quite possibly the sound of someone giving up mid-naming.</p> <p>The list goes on, unveiling Deklyn, Alarna (Is this a name or an exotic spice?), Aaryah (a name that looks like a typo in progress), Maz (likely short for Mazel Tov), Angel-Lee (a tribute to both celestial beings and two first names), and Karleb (a rebel in the world of traditional spelling).</p> <p>Social media users eagerly devoured this buffet of bewildering baby names, chiming in with their own comedic relief. One humorist quipped that some parents should enrol themselves in school, presumably for a crash course in 'Name Your Kid Without Making Them the Butt of Jokes.'</p> <p>Another jester added, "This really is tragic, at least none of them will get bullied because they're all so bad lol." A self-proclaimed comedian jibed, "These parents really aren't thinking it through."</p> <p>Yet amid the chuckles and facepalms, some thought the names were about as wild as a cup of herbal tea. One wise soul pointed out that among the chaos were rather mundane names like Diamond, Aliyah, Jaylene, Porsha, and Aalijah. Apparently, normality is now measured against the Syakyras of the world.</p> <p>Meanwhile, teachers everywhere collectively sighed in sympathy as they remembered their own quirky classroom encounters. One recounted an encounter with a "J'ley" (pronounced like Jaylee), a name that's the linguistic equivalent of a Rubik's Cube.</p> <p>A pupil named Pistol also made an appearance – because what kid doesn't want a name that guarantees zero playground conflicts? And lest we forget, a friend's teacher had the honour of teaching A'Blessyn. It's like the alphabet gipped, and the resulting letters spelled "Bless this child with an unforgettable name."</p> <p>However, the chaos isn't limited to the classroom. It's infiltrated even the most intimate corners of existence. Enter Reddit, where an expectant British dad took to the digital confessional to seek advice on his partner's fantastical name choices for their impending bundle of joy.</p> <p>The British bloke confessed that he'd prefer his offspring not be mistaken for an experimental rocket launch or a motor oil brand. He's opting for classic dignity, imagining a world where his kid doesn't have to explain why their name sounds like a weather forecast for Mercury. Meanwhile, the partner, a visionary in the field of avant-garde nomenclature, has pitched names like Fennix (for the spelling-challenged phoenix), Park (because nature reserves are inspiring, apparently), and Diesel (coming soon to a gas station near you).</p> <p>And so, as teachers practice their tongue-twister warm-ups and parents wage a war of wits over naming rights, we bid adieu to a world where names like John and Sarah were once considered bold.</p> <p>The age of the bewildering baby name is upon us, and the only certainty is that there's a whole generation of kids out there ready to conquer the world with names that defy both pronunciation and reason.</p> <p><em>Image: Shutterstock</em></p>

Family & Pets

Our Partners