Independent you: preventing, and recovering from, elder abuse
From implementing safeguards to stop it from beginning to taking back control if it does, there is a lot of power in your hands to avoid elder abuse.
Previously, we explored the warning signs of elder abuse and how it is possible to be a victim without even realising it.
And with more wealth owned by people over 60 now than ever before, the potential for abuse only continues to grow.
So, how can you prevent elder abuse happening to you? And if you are already experiencing it, what can you do to regain control over your finances, independence and wellbeing?
Prevention better than cure
The best way to avoid the impacts of elder abuse is to protect yourself against it beginning in the first place.
Awareness is the first step, so having read this article and knowing the warning signs, you’re already ahead of the game!
Other preventative actions include:
- Maintaining contact: social interactions are important not just for warding off loneliness but providing access to other points of view and avenues for support.
- External advisers: engage your own advisers – don’t simply employ who someone tells you to. They should be an impartial, qualified set of eyes to monitor things for you and point out anything that doesn’t seem right. This includes a financial advisor, lawyer, accountant, doctor and so on. A support person attending appointments with you may give you extra assurance.
- Power of attorney/guardianship: nominate multiple people, so that no one individual has all the say. It can be useful to include someone who is not a relative for impartiality, such as a trusted friend or your lawyer.
- Superannuation beneficiaries: super is separate from your will, but beneficiary nominations can only be spouse, child, dependent or interdependent otherwise it will go to you Will. In your Will you can direct to other people or charities. Some beneficiaries lapse, so will need to be renewed.
- Wills: review your will to ensure it reflects YOUR wishes, not someone else’s. People can jostle over not only their own inheritance but may try to influence you to leave others out.
- Documenting everything: keep a written record, especially where money is concerned – such as acting as Bank of Mum and Dad for adult kids to purchase property. Outline how much is given, what if any interest/repayments are expected and when, and what happens if their relationship subsequently breaks down.
- Encouraging independence: people who have come to expect handouts can become abusive if those handouts stop or requests for more are denied. Support and encourage others, especially your kids, to be financially independent and self-sufficient.
Taking back control
Sadly, prevention is no longer an option for an estimated 598,000 Australians already experiencing elder abuse. However, it is still possible to break the cycle.
Don’t be embarrassed or stick your head in the sand hoping things will improve. You have done nothing wrong. You are entitled to enjoy your retirement years.
To take back control over your affairs, your wellbeing and your independence:
- Ensure your physical safety first and foremost.
- Seek medical attention for your physical and mental health (the latter is crucial for making good decisions around the other points on this list).
- Get support from another relative, close friend, neighbour, or other trusted person. Don’t be alone.
- Secure a roof over your head. Having a stable place to live gives you the security and focus to tackle other concerns.
- Freeze access to your money – bank accounts, credit cards etc. This will stop (further) unauthorised withdrawals or purchases being charged to you.
- Seek professional advice. Your financial adviser, tax accountant and lawyer will be able to guide you through protecting your home, money, guardianship and estate planning matters.
- Make informed changes. Don’t do anything rashly – make necessary changes once you have sought independent advice and considered your options. This may involve making changes to your power of attorney, will, superannuation, bank accounts, even your phone number in extreme cases.
- Consider counselling. Your abuser may not realise the severity of their actions. An independent counsellor may be able to help them see this and change their ways, and ultimately salvage your relationship.
If you or someone you know is experiencing elder abuse, seek help straight away. Speak to a trusted relative or friend. Seek independent legal and financial advice about your affairs. Or call the government’s free elder abuse line on 1800 353 374. And if your life is in danger, call triple zero (000) immediately.
Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women. Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au
Disclaimer: The information in this article is of a general nature only and does not constitute personal financial or product advice. Any opinions or views expressed are those of the authors and do not represent those of people, institutions or organisations the owner may be associated with in a professional or personal capacity unless explicitly stated. Helen Baker is an authorised representative of BPW Partners Pty Ltd AFSL 548754.
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