10 things you’ll learn after living abroad
It's harder than you expect. When you have dreams of living in another country, you only think about the good stuff: the immersion in a rich culture, the new friends, the freedom of being in a place where no one knows your name.
But that's not the half of living overseas. What you don't picture is the hardship, the tangles with officialdom, the occasional loneliness, the battles with language, and thoughts of home.
Still, it's one of the best experiences you could ever have, and one that takes travelling to a whole new level. It also teaches you a thing or two.
1. Everyone thinks they come from the best country in the world
It's no secret that everyone thinks they come from the best country in the entire world (don't worry, they'll tell you when they're travelling). Italians, Swedes, Mexicans, Brazilians – you name it. National pride isn't something we can patent.
2. You're tougher than you think
So there you are in a foreign city, far from home, with no friends, no job, no apartment, no idea how anything works, and a bank balance that's swiftly dwindling towards nothing because you're frittering away your savings on comfort food and misery booze. Do you throw in the towel and go home? Slink back to your parents' house and reapply for your old job? No, you don't. You battle it out. You fight for your place in this new city, this new country. You make friends eventually; you get a job, you find a place to live, and you suddenly feel confident that Frank Sinatra was right: if you can make there, you'll make it anywhere.
3. Bureaucracy is a nightmare
Ever tried to open a bank account overseas? Ever tried to get a social security number, or a visa extension, or a lease signed, or a phone connected, or electricity set up, or complete any one of about a million little chores that will bring you into contact with the governmental and commercial institutions of the country you now call home? If so, you'll share a pathological hatred for bureaucracy, as you line up for the hundredth time at a shopfront in the middle of nowhere to do a job that should really have taken about 30 seconds over the phone.
4. Aussies are just Kiwis with funny accents
I know, I know, we like to think we're different, that we have a rivalry, that we have different ideas and different cultures. But when you're living overseas, none of that matters. Aussies and Kiwis share so many cultural touchstones that you'll forget you even come from separate countries. In fact there will come a time when you won't even be able to spot the difference in the accent. That's frightening.
5. You'll never be a local
This will come as a surprise, but unless you live in a foreign country for 10, 15, or maybe even 20 years, you'll never feel like a local. Particularly if you aren't fluent in the language. You'll never really know what's happening around you. You'll never understand the cultural nuances. There will be protests or demonstrations on the street you live in, and you'll have no idea what they're about. There will be celebrations, elections, disasters, and you'll never really be part of them. As an expat, you'll always be something of an outsider.
6. Australia is awesome
After a long period living in another country, there are certain things you're certain to crave about home. Like the friendly customer service – the fact people smile and say hello to you when you walk into a store. Actually, the fact that almost everyone smiles and says hello to you. Or the fact that you know how everything works in here, and you know where to find it. Or that there are people who pack your bags for you at the supermarket. Or the familiar conversations about sports teams and government officials. Or maybe you'll just miss the weather.
7. Tube Vegemite is different to jar Vegemite
It just doesn't last as long. Maybe it's a different recipe, or it's just the way it's packed. Whatever – Vegemite in a tube will go mouldy, so there's no point stashing it for special occasions. Just eat the stuff.
8. Expats are awesome
Need a shoulder to cry on? Need a partner to drink with? Need a group of people who will instantly become the best friends you ever had in the entire world? Then you need to find yourself some expats. It may be great to mix with the locals of whichever country you're now inhabiting, to integrate entirely with the foreign set, but chances are your real besties will be the ones going through the same experience you're going through: fellow expats. And they'll probably be the friendliest, most fun bunch in town.
9. Tourists are annoying
As an expat, you immediately and subconsciously elevate yourself to something above the humble tourist. It's not long before you're walking the city streets you've claimed as your own for nigh on two weeks now, complaining about all of the blow-ins ruining the atmosphere, and how it'd be so much better if all the tourists just went back to where they came from.
10. Coming back is bittersweet
You'll come home with all of these amazing stories of life overseas, all of these hilarious anecdotes, all of these heart-rending tales of hardship, these tear-jerking moments of sadness, these uplifting stories of success, these grand ideas of how you can change Australia and make it just like the fantastic place you called home for all of those years… And you'll soon find out that no one back home cares. Trust me, it's easier to just go back to talking about the footy.
Have you ever lived abroad? Tell us what you loved about it in the comments below.
Written by Ben Groundwater. First appeared on Stuff.co.nz.
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